Super Data Science: ML & AI Podcast with Jon Krohn 428: The Internal Conflict Model
Dec 18, 2020
Explore the intriguing gap between expectations and reality and how it shapes our emotional responses. Discover the Internal Conflict Model and its impact on anxiety stemming from past, present, and future mismatches. Learn two effective strategies for reducing anxiety: control and acceptance, illustrated through relatable examples. Delve into the concept of positive emotions driven by expectations, and participate in a mental experiment to shift your perception. Finally, gain insights on self-observation to alleviate suffering and achieve balance.
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Expectation-Reality Drives Emotion
- Emotions arise from a mismatch between expectation and reality, not directly from external events.
- When reality equals expectation, internal conflict vanishes and you feel calm.
Two Ways To Reduce Anxiety
- Reduce anxiety by either changing reality to match your expectations or by letting go of expectations and accepting reality.
- Choose acceptance when control is impossible to regain calm quickly.
Monica Versus The Monk
- Jon uses Monica from Friends as the archetype of a control-focused person who tries to bend reality to expectations.
- He contrasts her with a Buddhist monk who practices radical acceptance of reality.