Sons of Patriarchy

Behind the Scenes of Survivor Care: Deconstruction Doulas (Part 1)

Mar 26, 2026
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ANECDOTE

Pastor's Wife Audience Turned On Honest Struggle

  • Margaret built an initial online following as a pastor's wife challenging punitive theologies while still framing her faith as trustworthy.
  • Her audience respected her until she began honestly sharing depression, grief, and doubt, which triggered criticism and shunning.
ANECDOTE

Fired For Illness Then Shunned By Church

  • After public criticism, Margaret's husband was fired for being too sick and their church offered unpaid lay ministry work.
  • They tried to be gracious and patient before leaving, but faced defamation, shunning, and loss of livelihood.
ADVICE

Work With Survivor Focused Reporters

  • Work with survivor-centered journalists or organizations who go slow and prioritize participant consent when telling abuse stories.
  • Margaret praises Bodies Behind The Bus for respecting survivors' decisions and not exploiting them.
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