The mirror exercise and my teenager: listener question

Dear Clare, Regarding The Mirror - is this what you mean? I am resentful of my badly behaving teenage daughter because SHE is limiting MY freedom. She won't do what I say. She's out of control. I can't control her. And I need her to behave differently as I cannot continue with this intolerable situation. As a result of her constant drama, my life is out of control and not as I want it.

The Mirror: Where I am I doing what I am accusing her of?

My daughter is appearing as she is because I am limiting HER freedom. I won't do what she says. I'm controlling her. And she needs me to behave differently as she cannot continue with this intolerable situation. As a result of my constant drama, her life is out of her control and not as she wants it

I had not thought about it that way before, and I see that is totally true.

Now what? Stop limiting her freedom so she can stop limiting mine? Not possible due to the catastrophe and actual danger that would create - such a resistance to even considering this. Plus my identify of 'parent' is also pulled into this. BUT there is still an obvious 'me' and 'her' in what I've just written.

Thanks for the mirror, Clare - what do I DO with what I see? How do I 'unseparate' the 'separation' as is that even the aim of the game. Or what?