Goal Setting Toolkit: Why Behavior Change Often Fails & How to Set the Right Goals for You

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Jan 5, 2023

Explore the art of goal setting and discover why many fail before they start. Learn innovative techniques for identifying personal goals, including the power of mindfulness and self-reflection. Understand the vital role of intrinsic motivation and manageable objectives. Dive into effective strategies from research that emphasize emotional commitment and actionable steps. Finally, uncover how habits and supportive networks can empower your journey toward meaningful change. Get ready to redefine your goals!

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ADVICE

Don't Neglect the 'Why'

Avoid focusing only on the "how" and neglecting the "why" of your goals.
Pressure to change without a personal reason leads to rebellion and failure.

ANECDOTE

Dry January Example

Mel Robbins felt pressured into "dry January" but failed due to lacking a personal "why".
This year, her goal isn't dry January but reducing alcohol for focus and health.

ADVICE

Focus on Few Goals

Avoid setting too many goals at once, as it leads to inaction.
Focus on 1-3 goals to increase your chances of success.

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This episode will help you set the right goals for you.

Goals matter. They make your life easier and they create a sense of purpose and meaning.

But most people don’t set goals the right way, which is why they fail before they even start.

That’s not going to be you.

This episode is a comprehensive toolkit that will help you set the goals that inspire you and make you feel excited about the year ahead.

And, it’s part of our month-long series covering the foundational research and topics related to creating a better life.

Today, you’re not only going to learn the correct way to set goals according to research, you’re also going to identify 1-3 goals for yourself, and I’ll be doing the same thing right along with you.

Have no idea what your goals are or where to even start?

Don’t worry; you will by the end of the episode.

You’ll apply the latest research every single step of the way.

And that’s not all.

You can access a free companion workbook at melrobbins.com/goals that will walk you through everything we’re talking about so you can go even deeper into this conversation.

Expect your goals to change as you listen to this episode, so don’t worry about doing any of this “right.”

By the end of this episode you will have even taken the first steps toward your goal.

How cool is that? I can’t wait. Let’s get started.

Xo Mel

For full show notes, including all research mentioned in the episode, go to melrobbins.com/podcast.

For a free worksheet that dives deeper into the episode and helps you apply what you learn, click here.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

1:15: How do I set goals the right way?
2:56: Why setting goals is so important: the truth from research
8:24: The exciting new research about goals from Dr. Birkman that you need to know
10:56: My three goals for 2023
13:05: I’m answering your top question about goals
13:27: Four science-backed hacks to use when you’re not sure what your goals are
16:20: Three qualities of the best goals
21:48: Two components of a goal that you’ve got to have in order to achieve it
27:07: What neuroscience says about why your brain needs these two components
31:25: The five mistakes we all make when we set and try to achieve goals
42:41: A powerful question about goals from Columbia University researchers that you should ask yourself
44:57: Why setting a “high-low range goal” will make you more successful
50:33: The most important thing you should do once you set a goal
53:06: Here’s the crazy irony about achieving your goals

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