Better At Work with Cathal Quinlan When Your Team Member Hates You + A Thank You Email That Went Viral | Listener Questions
Q&A episode answering a tough leadership question from Emer, plus Annette's takeaways from Laura Gassner-Otting.
IN THIS EPISODE:
Thank You Email Goes Viral:
Cathal's email praising his daughter's teacher went around the whole school. Miss Smith said "You'd be surprised how little that happens." Why recognition matters more than we think.
Annette's Laura Takeaways:
- The Four Horsemen of Success (money, title, power, prestige) and why we chase them
- The Forces (Calling, Connection, Contribution, Control)
- "Refuse not to be happy now"
- Balance = being yourself everywhere
- Do Laura's quiz
Listener Question: New Leader, Difficult Team Member
Emer started a new leadership role. Most of her team is on board. But one woman has "taken a total dislike" to her. The woman ignores everything Emer says.
Annette's advice:
1. Work as team to agree on values/behaviors (clear is kind)
2. Get to know this person - seek to understand
3. Might be anxiety, trauma, nothing to do with you
4. Build connection and safety
Cathal's advice:
1. Start with YOU - is this about YOUR need for validation?
2. Imposter syndrome from previous org?
3. Ask open questions: "How are you finding it?" "Any concerns?"
4. Discuss ways of working
5. Reality check: She might just be difficult/jealous/wanted the job
6. If intractable after doing the work, she might need to go
Key Insights:
"You'd be surprised how little that happens." - Teacher receiving thank you
"Refuse not to be happy now. Balance is being yourself in work and life." - Annette
"Let's be real. She might be a piece of work. But we try to be fair." - Cathal
Resources:
Submit your career dilemma: betteratwork.net
Better at Work - Making work better, one conversation at a time.
New episodes every Thursday.
Hosted by Cathal Quinlan & Annette Sloan