But Why: A Podcast for Curious Kids Why are brothers and sisters so annoying?
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Feb 6, 2026 
Susan Dominus, journalist and author of The Family Dynamic, explores why siblings can both annoy and shape us. She discusses why siblings sometimes look alike. She talks about how siblings influence skills, choices, and each other’s successes. She explains why fights coexist with love and how sibling bonds can grow into deep friendships.
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Genes Aren't The Whole Story
- Genetics partly explain sibling resemblance, but genes are randomly assigned and traits vary in heritability.
- Shared environment and copying behaviors also make siblings look or act similar.
Looking Alike Without Shared DNA
- Jane Lindholm shares a story about people saying she looked like her stepfather though they weren't biologically related.
- She notes spending time together can make non-related family members look and act similar.
Siblings As Everyday Mentors
- Susan Dominus began researching parents' roles but found siblings repeatedly credited for guidance and practical help.
- Teenagers often prefer sibling advice over parents', even if they sometimes fight.
