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Ryan Holiday: Why You Need to Reparent Your 14-Year-Old Self & How to Overcome the Fear of Not Being Good Enough

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Sep 16, 2024

Guest

Ryan Holiday

Ryan Holiday, bestselling author and host of The Daily Stoic, shares his insights on the transformative power of intentional parenting. He reflects on how becoming a parent reshapes personal ambitions, emphasizing that true parenting goes beyond biological roles. Holiday discusses overcoming the 'not good enough' voice and finding fulfillment in personal growth. He highlights the significance of setting meaningful goals aligned with one's values and encourages embracing challenges as opportunities for growth. Jay adds his perspective on navigating parenthood with intention.

01:29:21

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ANECDOTE

Prioritizing Passion

Ryan Holiday recalls realizing the importance of pursuing his passion for writing.
He questioned prioritizing a well-paying job over his true calling, leading to a shift in his career.

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ADVICE

Building an Audience

Building an audience and competence takes time and consistent effort.
Don't expect overnight success; focus on methodical growth and improvement.

insights

INSIGHT

Life as Material

Life experiences, both positive and negative, become valuable material for personal and professional growth.
Embrace challenges as opportunities for learning and shaping your future work.

Get the Snipd Podcast app to discover more snips from this episode

Finding Meaning Beyond Accomplishments

01:37 • 2min

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The Heart of Parenting and Personal Growth

03:31 • 20min

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Engaging with Growth and Health

23:09 • 7min

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Navigating the Transition: From Corporate to Passion

30:34 • 15min

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Planting Seeds for the Future

45:56 • 6min

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Empowering Young Readers and Resilient Minds

52:00 • 19min

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Embracing Small Wins and Healing Connections

01:11:19 • 7min

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Navigating Parental Complexities

01:18:07 • 22min

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Embracing Vulnerability and Celebrating Small Wins

01:40:19 • 3min

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#12

• Mentioned in 444 episodes

The obstacle is the way

Ryan Holiday

In 'The Obstacle Is the Way', Ryan Holiday presents a framework for turning obstacles into successes. Drawing from the philosophy of Stoicism and the writings of Marcus Aurelius, Holiday outlines three disciplines: perception, action, and will. He illustrates these principles with historical anecdotes from figures such as John D. Rockefeller, Amelia Earhart, Ulysses S. Grant, and Steve Jobs. The book emphasizes the importance of perception in shaping one's response to obstacles, the need for intentional and creative action, and the cultivation of will to persist through challenges. Holiday argues that by adopting these Stoic principles, individuals can transform their obstacles into opportunities for growth and success.

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Premium Leatherbound Edition

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#66

• Mentioned in 229 episodes

Ego is the Enemy

Ryan Holiday

In *Ego Is the Enemy*, Ryan Holiday delves into the concept of ego and its detrimental effects on personal and professional success. The book is divided into three sections: Aspiration, Success, and Failure, each offering valuable lessons and perspectives. Holiday draws on a vast array of stories and examples from literature, philosophy, and history, featuring figures such as George Marshall, Jackie Robinson, Katharine Graham, Bill Belichick, and Eleanor Roosevelt. These individuals achieved great success by conquering their own egos, and their strategies and tactics are presented as models for readers. The book emphasizes the importance of staying grounded, continually learning, and embracing a mindset of growth rather than letting ego hinder development.

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• Mentioned in 340 episodes

The Daily Stoic

366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living

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Stephen Hanselman

This book provides 366 meditations on Stoic wisdom, featuring new translations of passages from Epictetus, Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, and other Stoic philosophers. Each day, readers are presented with a Stoic lesson explained in modern language, along with advice on how to apply these lessons in everyday life. The book is organized temporally and thematically across the twelve months of the year, making it a daily resource for practicing Stoicism.

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Conspiracy

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In 'Conspiracy', Ryan Holiday chronicles the intricate and ambitious plot by Peter Thiel to take down Gawker Media. The book is based on interviews with key players and delves into the strategic and philosophical underpinnings of Thiel's actions. It examines the intersection of power, privacy, and free speech in the digital age, highlighting the ruthless and brilliant tactics employed by Thiel. The narrative transcends a simple tale of a billionaire vs. a media empire, offering insights into the broader implications for culture and society.

#59

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Discipline is Destiny

The Power of Self-Control

Ryan Holiday

In 'Discipline is Destiny', Ryan Holiday explores the Stoic virtue of self-discipline, drawing on historical figures and contemporary examples to illustrate its transformative power. The book emphasizes that discipline is the foundation upon which other virtues such as courage, justice, and wisdom depend. Holiday argues that self-control is essential for personal triumph and fulfillment, and he provides engaging stories and practical advice on how to cultivate discipline in a world filled with distractions and temptations. The book also cautions against the perils of extravagance and hedonism, stressing the importance of balance and self-mastery in achieving success and happiness.

#81

• Mentioned in 198 episodes

Stillness is the Key

Ryan Holiday

In 'Stillness is the Key', Ryan Holiday explores the concept of inner stillness as a universal principle across different philosophical and religious traditions, including Stoicism, Buddhism, Epicureanism, and more. The book is divided into three sections: stillness of the mind, stillness of the spirit, and stillness of the body. Holiday argues that cultivating stillness allows for better decision-making, increased focus, and a more fulfilling life. He uses anecdotes from historical figures and contemporary examples to illustrate the importance of moderation, patience, and self-awareness in achieving this state of stillness.

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Salim Ismail

This book, written by Salim Ismail, Yuri van Geest, and Michael S. Malone, explores the concept of Exponential Organizations (ExOs). It outlines how companies can use externalities such as community, big data, algorithms, and new technologies to achieve performance benchmarks ten times better than traditional companies. The book provides a roadmap for transforming any company, from startups to multinationals, into an ExO by leveraging the 10 characteristics of Exponential Organizations, represented by the acronyms S.C. A. L. E. (Staff on Demand, Community & Crowd, AI & Algorithms, Leveraged Assets, Engagement) and I.D. E. A. S (Interfaces, Dashboards, Experimentation, Autonomy, Social).

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This autobiography provides an intimate look into David Beckham's life, covering his rise to fame, personal struggles, and career milestones. It includes candid discussions about his marriage, family, and the pressures of celebrity life.

What would you tell your 14-year-old self?

How do you quiet the “not good enough” voice?

Today, Jay welcomes Ryan Holiday, renowned philosopher, bestselling author, and host of The Daily Stoic. With over 10 million copies of his books sold globally, Ryan returns to the podcast to dive deep into the concepts of personal growth, parenting, and finding purpose in a success-driven world.

Ryan reflects on the journey of becoming a parent and discusses the difference between having kids and truly being a parent. He explains why intentional parenting is a radical shift from simply fulfilling biological or legal roles and explores the transformative impact of parenthood on personal and professional ambitions, emphasizing the importance of being prepared for the changes it brings.

Jay also opens up about his own thoughts on parenthood and the life shifts that accompany major decisions, offering a heartfelt glimpse into the conversations he’s had with his wife about the timing of having children. Throughout the conversation, both Jay and Ryan unpack the struggles of balancing a career with personal life, with Ryan drawing from Stoic philosophy to offer guidance on setting meaningful goals, aligning actions with values, and learning from life's obstacles.

In this interview, you'll learn:

How to Embrace Parenthood as a Central Life Purpose

How to Set Goals Based on What’s in Your Control

How to Approach Parenting with Intention and Purpose

How to Learn from Life’s Obstacles and Failures

How to Align Your Career with Personal Values

How to Build Emotional Resilience through Parenthood

Whether through parenting, personal growth, or our professional pursuits, the key is to stay rooted in what truly matters—our values, intentions, and the legacy we leave behind.

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty

What We Discuss:

00:00 Intro

01:33 Are You Ready to Become a Parent?

05:43 What Type of Goal Should We Set?

10:54 Love What You’re Doing

18:59 Stuck in Life

22:06 Trust the Process

26:04 Patience

30:18 Process of Accumulating Experiences

33:35 What Difference Are You Making?

35:57 Raise a Reader

40:14 What Are You Struggling With?

45:00 General Parenting Tip

52:56 Unconditional Parental Love

58:50 Do What’s Important to You

01:02:04 What is at Stake?

01:06:03 Comparison Game

01:09:36 Dad Guilt

01:15:30 Fear as a Parent

01:19:11 This Stops with Me

Episode Resources:

Ryan Holiday | Website

Ryan Holiday | Instagram

Ryan Holiday | Facebook

Ryan Holiday | TikTok

Ryan Holiday | YouTube

Ryan Holiday | LinkedIn

The Daily Dad: 366 Meditations on Parenting, Love, and Raising Great Kids

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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