A Jewish Divorce Mediator Shares What She Sees Behind Closed Doors

Dec 24, 2025

Sarah Nissel, an attorney and law professor, leads the Jewish Divorce Assistance Center of Los Angeles, bringing a wealth of experience in mediating divorces. She discusses the taboo of money in marriage, highlighting how financial conflicts often mask deeper issues. Sarah advocates for proactive financial education and honest money conversations before and during marriage. She emphasizes the importance of self-awareness, communication, and community resources, transforming the chuppah from a finish line into a starting point for a thriving partnership.

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ADVICE

Don't Resolve Conflicts While Hot

When conflict arises, pause and resume the conversation when calm rather than resolving issues while heated.
Take breaks, write down grievances, and accept some things will not change about the other person.

INSIGHT

Who Manages Money Is Changing

Modern trends show wives often manage household money even when husbands earn, creating hidden knowledge gaps.
Sarah Nissel notes this inversion can leave spouses unaware of assets, debts, and passwords at separation.

ADVICE

Ensure Both Spouses Know The Basics

Both spouses should know key financial facts: account statements, debts, mortgage, and equity even if one handles daily finances.
Sarah Nissel recommends simple steps like running a credit report to start awareness.

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