Abel James Show Why Trying to Calm Down is Stressing You Out with Dr. Rebecca Heiss
Mar 12, 2026
01:02:55
Feeling a little stressed lately?
You're certainly not alone.
Counterintuitively, instead of beating yourself up for not being able to calm down and eliminate stress altogether, consciously taking on more stress can actually make you perform better.
It's strange but true: "When you need something done, give it to a busy person."
Stress doesn't need to paralyze you or bowl you over, it's a natural energy that can be directed and used to your advantage. The problem is that our ancient brains can't keep up with modern threats.
As our guest puts it: tigers of the savanna have transformed into a snarling inbox.
Since avoiding stress is impossible, what if we stopped trying to "reduce stress" and instead learned to open the floodgates, harnessing our natural energy to use stress as a source of strength, focus and momentum?
In this age of unprecedented technological change and and crippling career insecurity, how can we conquer fear and regain clarity and confidence in the face of uncertainty?
Today we're here with Dr. Rebecca Heiss, a stress physiologist, researcher, keynote speaker, and author of the new book Springboard. Her work has been called transformative by the National Science Foundation, and after this episode, you’ll understand why.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Find Dr. Rebecca Heiss and her work at:
You can also join Substack as a free or paid member for ad-free episodes of this show, to comment on each episode, and to hit me up in the DM’s. Join at abeljames.substack.com. And if you’re feeling generous, write a quick review for the Abel James Show on Apple or Spotify. You rock.
This episode is brought to you by:
Tonum Health – Go to Tonum.com/WILD and punch in code WILD for 10 % off your first order.
MUD/WTR - Go to mudwtr.com and use code ABELJAMES to save 43% off your order with free shipping, plus a free rechargeable frother gift.
You're certainly not alone.
Counterintuitively, instead of beating yourself up for not being able to calm down and eliminate stress altogether, consciously taking on more stress can actually make you perform better.
It's strange but true: "When you need something done, give it to a busy person."
Stress doesn't need to paralyze you or bowl you over, it's a natural energy that can be directed and used to your advantage. The problem is that our ancient brains can't keep up with modern threats.
As our guest puts it: tigers of the savanna have transformed into a snarling inbox.
Since avoiding stress is impossible, what if we stopped trying to "reduce stress" and instead learned to open the floodgates, harnessing our natural energy to use stress as a source of strength, focus and momentum?
In this age of unprecedented technological change and and crippling career insecurity, how can we conquer fear and regain clarity and confidence in the face of uncertainty?
Today we're here with Dr. Rebecca Heiss, a stress physiologist, researcher, keynote speaker, and author of the new book Springboard. Her work has been called transformative by the National Science Foundation, and after this episode, you’ll understand why.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
- Why telling a stressed out person to calm down is the worst possible thing you can do
- Why stress management workshops make us more stressed
- How rugged individualism is fueling a stress epidemic, especially for men
- Why adults desperately need more play, community, and shared challenge — and how that protects your brain
- Why we’re more afraid of snakes, spiders, and public speaking than the tiny daily choices that quietly steal years off our lives
- And much more...
Find Dr. Rebecca Heiss and her work at:
- Website: RebeccaHeiss.com
- Book: Springboard
- Facebook: @drrebeccaheiss
- X: @DrRebeccaHeiss
- Instagram: @drrebeccaheiss
- YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCO3XmakQmJX0z0TbSfr3agg
- LinkedIn: @rebeccaheiss
You can also join Substack as a free or paid member for ad-free episodes of this show, to comment on each episode, and to hit me up in the DM’s. Join at abeljames.substack.com. And if you’re feeling generous, write a quick review for the Abel James Show on Apple or Spotify. You rock.
This episode is brought to you by:
Tonum Health – Go to Tonum.com/WILD and punch in code WILD for 10 % off your first order.
MUD/WTR - Go to mudwtr.com and use code ABELJAMES to save 43% off your order with free shipping, plus a free rechargeable frother gift.