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Akshi Singh & Anouchka Grose: In Defence of Leisure

Feb 4, 2026

Guest

Anouchka Grose

Guest

Akshi Singh

Anouchka Grose, psychoanalyst and writer, brings psychoanalytic curiosity. Akshi Singh, scholar and author of In Defence of Leisure, explores Marion Milner’s experiments in rest and creativity. They discuss discovering true likes through diaries and practice. Conversations cover rest, play, creativity, bodily attention, desire versus liking, and a gentle manifesto for disruptive leisure.

58:37

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Episode notes

insights

INSIGHT

Life Beyond A Room

A 'life of one's own' is broader than a 'room of one's own' and invites expansive, undefined wanting.
Milner champions desire itself, not necessarily its fulfillment.

insights

INSIGHT

Desire As Enlivening Force

Desire functions as an enlivening force rather than a problem to be endlessly deferred.
Both speakers value modest satisfactions as meaningful rather than total cures.

question_answer

ANECDOTE

Decorating To Pretend Security

Akshi Singh recounts furnishing a home via charity shops as a way to construct a life.
She used objects to hallucinate security while missing deeper needs like sexual pleasure.

Get the Snipd Podcast app to discover more snips from this episode

How Akshi Found Marion Milner

02:38 • 3min

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Milner's Demand on the Reader

05:10 • 1min

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Room of One's Own vs A Life of One's Own

06:25 • 3min

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Desire, Happiness and Everyday Wants

Writing, Free-Association and Getting Out of the Way

13:58 • 4min

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Why the Book Covers So Much

18:03 • 1min

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Milner, Psychoanalysis and the Body

19:30 • 17min

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Milner's Eclectic Reading and Limits

36:31 • 2min

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Defining Leisure Beyond Consumption

38:48 • 4min

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A Gentle Non-Bossy Leisure Manifesto

43:00 • 1min

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Leisure, Psychoanalysis and Healing

44:30 • 4min

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From Reading Milner to Writing the Book

48:37 • 49sec

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Liking vs Desire, and Gender Effects

49:25 • 5min

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Ethics of Care and Loneliness Politics

Notes on Hearing and Being Heard

In Defence of Leisure

Akshi Singh

#7651

• Mentioned in 6 episodes

Dao De Jing

Classic of the Way and Virtue

Lao Tzu (Laozi)

The Dao De Jing, also known as the Tao Te Ching, is a central text of Taoist thought, composed of 81 brief chapters that explore the nature of reality, ethics, and governance. It emphasizes living in harmony with the natural order (the Dao) and advocates for simplicity, humility, and non-action (wuwei). The text has been influential in Chinese philosophy and continues to be studied worldwide for its insights into spirituality and governance.

A Life of One's Own

M. Milner

#14084

• Mentioned in 4 episodes

Complicated Women

B. Wilson

#18

• Mentioned in 409 episodes

The Body Keeps the Score

Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma

Bessel van der Kolk

In this book, Dr. Bessel van der Kolk uses recent scientific advances to show how trauma reshapes both the body and brain, compromising sufferers’ capacities for pleasure, engagement, self-control, and trust. He explores various treatments, including neurofeedback, meditation, sports, drama, and yoga, which activate the brain’s natural neuroplasticity to aid in recovery. The book emphasizes the power of relationships in both causing and healing trauma and offers hope through descriptions of novel approaches to treatment. It is based on Dr. van der Kolk’s own research and that of other leading specialists in the field.

#18344

• Mentioned in 3 episodes

Becoming a Philosopher

Jonathan Ray

#3757

• Mentioned in 13 episodes

Patanjali Yoga Sutras

Swami Prabhavananda

This book presents Patanjali's Yoga Sutras in a modern translation with commentary by Swami Prabhavananda. It encapsulates the essence of yoga, going beyond physical postures to include philosophical and practical aspects. The translation is accompanied by the Devanagari text and transliteration, making it accessible to both Indian and Western readers. The commentary by Swami Prabhavananda and Christopher Isherwood helps in understanding the non-technical and up-to-date phraseology used in the book.

#547

• Mentioned in 57 episodes

Notes from Underground

Fyodor Dostoevsky

Fyodor Dostoevsky's "Notes from Underground" is a novella that delves into the mind of an unnamed narrator, a bitter and alienated individual who rails against reason and societal norms. The work is considered a precursor to existentialist literature, exploring themes of isolation, nihilism, and the human condition. Dostoevsky's masterful use of first-person narration allows readers to experience the narrator's turbulent thoughts and emotions. The novella's exploration of free will and the complexities of human psychology continues to resonate with readers today. Its influence on literature and philosophy is undeniable, shaping the works of later writers and thinkers.

#611

• Mentioned in 53 episodes

Madame Bovary

Gustave Flaubert

Published in 1857, 'Madame Bovary' is a seminal work of literary realism that tells the story of Emma Bovary, a beautiful and intelligent young woman who marries Charles Bovary, a dull and unambitious doctor. Emma's life is marked by boredom, romantic fantasies, and a series of ill-fated love affairs with men like Rodolphe and Léon. Her inability to distinguish between her romantic ideals and the harsh realities of her life leads to financial ruin, public scandal, and ultimately, her tragic demise. The novel is renowned for its masterful writing, detailed psychological insights, and its critique of bourgeois provincial life.

In her new book In Defence of Leisure (Cape), Akshi Singh presents Marion Milner as a writer for our times. In asking the simple question: how do I want to spend my free time? Milner developed a method for discovering her true likes and dislikes. As Singh follows Milner’s approach – from keeping a diary to painting, building a home to travelling to the sea – she discovers the importance of rest, creativity and play in all of our lives, and how it can open the door to achieving what we truly desire.

Singh was in conversation with Anouchka Grose, psychoanalyst, writer and climate campaigner whose books include Uneasy Listening: Notes on Hearing and Being Heard (Mack, 2022) and Fashion: a Manifesto (Notting Hill Editions, 2023).

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