The Simplicity Parenting Podcast with Kim John Payne #89: Aloneness vs Loneliness – To Zoom Or Not To Zoom
Apr 21, 2020
They explore the difference between aloneness and loneliness and why that distinction matters for children. The conversation questions constant video connections and asks whether Zoom is always helpful. Stories show how tangible mail and solo play can build creativity, inner voice, and lasting bonds. Teachers swapping video for letters and daily drawings get highlighted.
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Aloneness Versus Loneliness
- Humans can and should learn the difference between aloneness and loneliness.
- Aloneness allows inner voice development instead of frantic herd-seeking.
Limit Video Conferencing For Young Kids
- Avoid treating video conferencing as the main way to keep children social during isolation.
- Give children time and space for aloneness so social impulses can deepen rather than stay superficial.
Use Mail To Deepen Children's Connections
- Do prioritize tangible exchanges (letters, drawings, small finds) over frequent video calls for young children.
- Encourage mail-based projects to deepen connection and extend social feeling across days and weeks.