MOMENT | If Becoming a Mother Has Changed How You See Your Own Childhood, Listen to This

“It’s how you were parented that lays the foundation – it sets the blueprint for your own parenting.”

This is a short moment from a much bigger conversation on Motherkind. But it tends to stop people in their tracks.

In this clip, Harriet and Zoe talk about something so many of us don’t fully look at until we become parents ourselves – the relationship we had with our own parents, and how that quietly shapes the way we show up with our children.

Harriet shares what it can be like to grow up in an enmeshed relationship, where you’re very close, but boundaries are blurred, where you might have been the best friend, the emotional support, the one who grew up a little too quickly. And how becoming a mum can suddenly shine a light on things you once told yourself were “fine”.

She shares a question she now asks her clients – and it’s a powerful one: Would you want your child to have the childhood you had?

This clip gently explores some of the early signs that something might feel off – struggling to say no, feeling guilty for wanting things differently, having your boundaries minimised or dismissed. And how confusing that can be, especially when you rely on your parent for support or childcare.

If this resonates, please know you’re not alone. And you’re not ungrateful. And you’re not making it up.

This is just one small part of a much bigger, compassionate conversation about awareness, autonomy, and breaking cycles – without blame, and with a lot of kindness.

If you liked this moment, listen to the full episode: Generational trauma expert: How to break unhealthy patterns and become the parent you wish you'd had - with Harriet Shearsmith

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Connect with Zoe:

• Follow Zoe on Instagram 
• Get Zoe’s Sunday Times bestselling book, 'Motherkind: A New Way to Thrive in a World of Endless Expectations’

This Motherkind episode is sponsored by:

• Headline sponsor Wild Nutrition, the brand raising the bar for women’s supplements. Want to feel the Food-Grown difference yourself? Get 50% off for three months at wildnutrition.com/motherkind. Ts and Cs apply.
• For a £100 sponsored job credit, visit Indeed.com/ Motherkind

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