Transforming Trauma Healing Shame and Guilt using NARM® with Dr. Laurence Heller
May 13, 2026
Dr. Laurence Heller, clinical psychologist and creator of NARM, reframes shame as an adaptive survival process rooted in developmental trauma. He explores how shame protects attachment, shows up implicitly in identity and sexuality, and affects therapists too. The conversation highlights embodiment, making implicit shame explicit, intergenerational patterns, and pathways toward disidentifying from shame.
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Do Your Own Shame Work To Avoid Countertransference
- Therapists must do their own work on shame to avoid countertransference like blaming the client or shaming themselves for perceived lack of progress.
- Heller warns that therapist shame shows up as self-blame or blaming clients for 'resistance', so attend to it explicitly.
Use Bodily Anchors Not Just Cognitive Tools
- Combine bottom-up attention to bodily sensations with inquiry because the body stores disconnection; anchor shifts in awareness on bodily experience.
- Heller emphasizes embodiment over purely cognitive techniques, noting regulation alone won't remove shame or self-hatred.
Book Structure Links Public Understanding To Clinical Tools
- The book is split: the majority for the general public to understand and work with shame, and the final part for clinicians integrating developmental trauma and ACEs.
- Heller distinguishes shame from guilt and focuses clinical techniques on the protective function of shame.
