Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo 2009 Can the Person Who Hurt You Fix You?
In life, we are in search of a quick fix. It would be really nice if life was that easy. But instead, we are faced with challenges that scream war.
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Hurt cuts to the core; right to the heart. And since we are selfish beings, we have a tendency to keep score. Even with the best intentions, there is a slight tendency to have a running scorecard.
Plus, whether we want to admit it or not, if we are hurt, then let the war begin. We jump to conclusions before hearing the whole story. We want to get back at the person who wronged us, especially if it's our spouse. Perspectives clash.
Now in some circumstances, I certainly understand why you get upset and mad at your spouse to the point of wanting all-out war.
Overall, with the dismantling of our feelings, we want the person who hurt us to fix us and that includes our spouse.
Yet is that right? Is that fair?
You can argue all sides. And at times I would agree that there are good points from all sides too.
Still, we expect the hurt that was dished out to be repaired and healed by the one who hurt us.
Unfortunately, that's not what happens. If you are waiting for someone to heal your hurts, you will be waiting a lifetime.
Hurt cannot be taken back once it is distributed. The damage is already done.
That's why you want to think before you do anything. But in a "reactive" world, the hurt is greater in our every day.
Can the person who hurt you fix you?
No!!
In marriage, we are missing the mark on how to heal our hurts, because the focus remains on our spouse.
To get beyond the hurt and to allow yourself to heal, the fix comes in forgiveness.
The K.I.S.S. ~ Fix yourself with forgiveness!Forgiveness gives yourself permission and the space to heal even when your situation seems impossible.
Forgiveness is not for the other person. It's a gift to yourself, which ultimately benefits your marriage.
- Forgiveness is freedom.
- Forgiveness is love.
- Forgiveness is hope.
You can continue to play the blame game, but that's just war for a lifetime.
Hurt is not fun. It's uncomfortable. The pain it brings is so deep at times that you feel like you can't even breathe.
However, you can't live a life in bondage. At least not the life that God has in store for you.
Stop the yelling and the fighting trying to prove your point that you are hurt. Most likely, your partner already knows.
Be bold for YOU!
Focus on the fix of forgiveness.
"Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"
#RelationshipBuilders #CreateYourNow #LoveAndMarriage
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Read more from Kristianne, a contributor to The Huffington Post, MindBodyGreen, Thrive Global, Addicted2Succes, and She Owns It.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/kristianne-wargo/
https://sheownsit.com/when-failure-is-your-middle-name/
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Cover Art by Jenny Hamson
Photo by Ba Tik on Pexels.com
Music by Mandisa - Overcomer
http://www.mandisaofficial.com
Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) 9t One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music - Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.