The Curious Introvert Ep. 337: Can a Sexless Marriage Survive? [REMASTERED]
What exactly is considered "sexless"? What are we counting as sex? What would cause someone to not want to have sex all of a sudden?
These are all questions I unpacked with Xanet Pailet. She was a successful healthcare lawyer married to an attorney with two children. She lived in a beautiful home in NYC as well as a sexless marriage. At age 45 and no sex for over 15 years, she considered sex as something she was just done with.
Now she is a full time intimacy educator with a fulfilling sex life. You’ll hear about resentment caused pain, the stuck place of indifference, what men are afraid of, medical procedures that can cause painful sex & listener Q & A from my Facebook group.
This episode originally aired March 11, 2024.
If you liked this episode, you’ll also like episode 214: WHAT ARE THE RULES OF MONOGAMY? THE PSYCHOLOGIST SWINGER
Guest:
https://www.passionateintimacyretreats.com/
https://www.powerofpleasure.com/
https://www.instagram.com/xanetpop/
https://twitter.com/powerofpleasure
https://www.facebook.com/xanetpop
Sponsors:
https://www.jordanharbinger.com/starterpacks/
https://www.historicpensacola.org/about-us/
01:00 — What actually counts as “sexless”
03:00 — The “charcuterie board” of intimacy
06:00 — Separate bedrooms, separate lives
07:00 — Never masturbated… until 48
09:00 — When pleasure and anxiety get wired together
10:00 — Medical trauma no one talks about
13:00 — Circumcision, sensation, and what we lose
14:00 — Are some sexual issues permanent?
16:00 — The emotional root of physical pain
17:00 — Why resentment can make sex hurt
18:00 — When your partner feels like your child
20:00 — Masculine vs feminine energy in relationships
22:00 — Why men stop initiating (and don’t say why)
24:00 — Consent confusion and modern dating fears
26:00 — When no sex is… totally fine
27:00 — The menopause “I don’t care anymore” myth
28:00 — When bad sex kills desire completely
31:00 — The surprise return of desire after divorce
33:00 — The real answer: can it survive?
36:00 — Rebuilding intimacy from zero
40:00 — The hidden reality of sex in Japan
41:00 — Should you open the relationship?
43:00 — Sexless dynamics in same-sex couples
45:00 — Porn, gaming, and disconnection
48:00 — Rethinking sex after physical limitations
53:00 — Outercourse, body mapping, and new pathways
55:00 — Menopause, pain, and what actually helps
57:00 — Why “working on it” feels overwhelming
59:00 — The missing piece: non-sexual intimacy
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