The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos Why Algorithms Can’t Predict Your Love Life with Dr. Paul Eastwick
49 snips
Feb 23, 2026 
Dr. Paul Eastwick, social psychologist and author studying romantic compatibility, challenges common myths about attraction. He explains why dating apps and “mate value” thinking mislead, argues compatibility often grows through interaction, and suggests widening social pools and giving connections time to develop. Expect a refreshingly hopeful take on how love can be made, not just predicted.
AI Snips
Chapters
Books
Transcript
Episode notes
Stated Wants Diverge From Real Choices
- Surveyed preferences differ from revealed preferences measured in real interactions.
- In speed-dating studies, men and women show similar revealed preferences for traits like ambition and attractiveness.
Short-Term Appeal Doesn't Dictate Long-Term Fit
- Short-term sexual desirability largely doesn't predict long-term relationship success.
- Being a short-term 'sexy' partner doesn't mean you'll be a poor long-term partner.
Our Minds Downplay Attractive Alternatives
- People in relationships mentally downgrade potential alternatives to protect the bond.
- Motivated cognition makes partnered people imagine less attractive alternatives than singles do.
