Girls Gone Deep 142: RDBSM: The Conversation Every Couple Needs to Have Before Their First Play Party, plus Collars, Limerence & Cum Boundaries
This week, Vee and Elle unpack everything couples should talk about before stepping into a shared play space—from emotional boundaries to desires, jealousy, and how to reconnect afterward, using a conversation framework they learned on an ISTA retreat. From collars and rituals to new relationship energy (NRE), aka limerence, and the messy middle between fantasy and reality—Vee goes deep on her experience. Whether you're new to the lifestyle, playing with a new partner, or redefining your relationship agreements, this episode is packed with real talk, practical tools, and deeply personal moments.
RDBSM (Relationship, Desires, Boundaries, Sexual Health, Meaning). (00:25)
R: Relationship: Vee navigates a new Monogamish relationship with Mister A. Dom/sub dynamics and wearing collars to denote ownership and ritual. (6:13)
Conscious Relating: redefining your relationships as they fit into your life. (7:26)
D: Desires: playing together with another couple or a female unicorn. (13:31)
B: Boundaries: the idea of men’s cum as ownership leading to wanting to be there for your partner’s orgasm. (13:57)
NRE (New Relationship Energy) vs Love: WTF is limerence? And how do you know when it’s evolved from new relationship energy to actual true romantic love? Instability vs stability. (17:14)
Boundaries contd: Not playing separately, keeping play and connection in the container of the scene or the play party, and then “keep it in the group text”. Locking in and taking the performative aspect out of exhibitionism. (20:37)
M: Meaning: creating a container to explore safely within the time boundaries of the party. (26:30)
Traffic Light System: What to do in the moment if you’re feeling activated or jealous? Borrowing from BDSM scenes to have a safe word or traffic light system in more traditional scenes. (29:15)
A: Aftercare: going home together, reconnecting, and talking over breakfast? (33:13)
Post-Party: Back to School theme and showing ownership by wearing a collar. (34:29)
Wax Play experience: performing for your man when you know he’s watching. (37:38)
Connecting with your partner first: Vee cums for the first time at a play party! (42:44)
Mixed feelings: Watching your partner fuck someone else. What a guy should say when the female is unsure about playing. (45:42)
______
How to Support the Show:
💰 Donate Here
💋Linktree: https://linktr.ee/girlsgonedeep
🎧 Instagram: @girlsgonedeeppod
🛍️ Merch: girlsgonedeep.com/shop — wear your kinks proudly.
🍑 Woo More Play: Shop with our affiliate link
— support the pod while you stock up on your favorite pleasure essentials.
🪄 WAANDS™: Crystal Pleasure Products HERE. Get 15% off with code GIRLSGONEDEEP
🔮 WHOREible Life: Get 10% off your game deck with code GONEDEEP at whoreiblelife.com IG: @wlthegame
🔥 Naughty Disco’s Sexy NYC Dance Party: code GONEDEEP69 for 15% off any event ticket IG: @naughtydisco
💌 Contact: girlsgonedeep@gmail.com
© 2025 GGD Alchemy, LLC. All Rights Reserved.