Kelly Corrigan Wonders

Deep Dive with Courtney Smith on the Stories We Tell Ourselves

Feb 24, 2026
Courtney Smith, Enneagram coach and co-author of Choosing Wholeness Over Goodness, explores cultural scripts women inherit and how they shape identity. Short, punchy conversations cover fixed vs emergent selves, gender narratives, reframing envy and busyness, the Enneagram’s overlap with cultural stories, tools for facing fear, and why claiming responsibility can open new freedom.
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INSIGHT

Let Your Sense Of Self Be Emergent

  • Let your sense of self be emergent rather than fixed.
  • Courtney Smith frames fixed vs growth mindset as whether you see your identity and culture as changeable, and urges expecting self-evolution over time.
ADVICE

Say No Without Feeling Slothful

  • Say no without equating it to sloth; protecting your time is boundary work not moral failure.
  • Smith links cultural pressure that women must always prioritize others to chronic overwork and fatigue and recommends practicing refusal.
INSIGHT

Envy Reveals Unfulfilled Wants

  • Reframe envy as a signal of unmet wants rather than a moral failing.
  • Smith calls envy a "leaky expression" that reveals desires women are socially discouraged from voicing or pursuing.
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