The Cure for Chronic Pain with Nicole Sachs, LCSW

Why Other People Trigger You—and What It Reveals About Your Own Healing

Mar 27, 2026
A deep dive into why certain people trigger intense reactions and what those triggers reveal about disowned parts of yourself. The conversation explores victim mindset, shame, and inner conflict as drivers of chronic pain and tension. A simple two-sided writing exercise and a three-step self-compassion break are offered as practical ways to begin uncovering and healing those hidden dynamics.
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ANECDOTE

Freshman Seminar Two Sided Paper Exercise

  • Nicole Sachs describes a college freshman seminar exercise where students list what they like about themselves on one side and what they hate in others on the other side.
  • She realized the traits that anger you in others are often qualities you secretly desire or repress, using punctuality as her example.
INSIGHT

Conflict Is The Trigger For TMS Pain

  • Nicole asserts internal conflict — feeling two opposing truths about something — is the main driver of TMS (mind-body pain).
  • Examples: unwavering confidence about parenting causes no TMS, whereas mixed feelings about self-promotion create internal pain signals.
INSIGHT

Seeing Others As Mirrors Lowers Emotional Load

  • Seeing the qualities you judge in others as parts of yourself reduces resentment and lowers the emotional 'reservoir' that fuels chronic symptoms.
  • Nicole connects this to the two-sided paper: recognizing you secretly want the behavior you hate eases judgment.
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