Ask the Counselor by CCEF How do I discern true repentance from fake repentance?
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Mar 12, 2026 Darby Strickland, CCEF faculty member and counselor, explains how to tell genuine repentance from hollow remorse. He contrasts worldly sorrow with godly sorrow. He uses Zacchaeus as an example of visible change. He stresses protecting the harmed, specificity in confession, dependence on God, and ongoing pursuit of holiness and restoration.
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Repentance Shows Visible Life Change
- True repentance changes identity and behavior, offering real hope for rebuilding relationships.
- Darby Strickland uses Zacchaeus as an example: he returned money fourfold and gave half his possessions, showing visible life transformation.
Worldly Sorrow Versus Godly Sorrow
- Scripture distinguishes worldly sorrow from godly sorrow and godly sorrow produces inward and outward change.
- Darby emphasizes we must identify godly sorrow and also foster it, because it affects both thinking and behavior.
Make Confession Toward God Central
- Listen for confession that recognizes the offense as ultimately against God, not just the person harmed.
- Darby points to Psalm 51 and David's 'against you, you only, I have sinned' as the model for honest confession.