624: How to Be More Charismatic and Have Great Conversations with Vanessa Van Edwards
Achieve Your Goals with Hal Elrod
Vanessa's Awkwardness and the Awkwardness Loop
Vanessa shares her recovering-awkward story and explains the feedback loop that amplifies social anxiety.
Have you ever walked into a room or given a presentation and immediately felt awkward? Or maybe you struggle with confidence or imposter syndrome at live gatherings or even on Zoom meetings? If so, this episode is for you.
As you'll hear from today's guest, confidence isn't the absence of awkwardness—it's feeling it, acknowledging it, and showing up anyway. And she has the tools to help you do just that.
Vanessa Van Edwards is a behavioral researcher, the founder of Science of People, and the best-selling author of Cues and Captivate. Her 'You Are Contagious' Ted Talk is phenomenal and has over 6 million views for good reason. Vanessa has spent her career studying the hidden cues and social signals that shape how people perceive us, and how we can take control of those signals to build trust faster and connect more deeply.
In our conversation, Vanessa breaks down charisma into a simple, learnable framework: warmth + competence. We talk about the four ways we "signal" others with verbal and physical cues, why most people don't signal strongly enough, and how that can actually make you seem colder, less confident, or harder to connect with—even when you have great intentions.
You'll also learn how to ask better questions to initiate conversations, how to nail the first 10 seconds of any interaction, and a few practical ways to show up with more presence and confidence. Trust me, this episode is a must-listen for anyone.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- Vanessa's "Miracle Morning" and Why Starting Energy Matters
- The Awkwardness Loop and How To Overcome It
- How Charisma Can Be Learned and Cultivated
- The Four Ways We "Signal" in Every Interaction
- Imposter Syndrome and Owning What You Don't Know
- Script-Breaking Questions That Boost Charisma
- The First 10 Seconds: First Impressions Matter
- Bonus Tip: Choose Positivity In The First 10 Words
- How to Connect With Vanessa & Get Her Newsletter
Get The Full Show Notes
To get full access to today's show notes, including audio, transcript, and links to all the resources mentioned, visit MiracleMorning.com/624
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