Why Desire Disappears

Let's be honest — for all the progress we've made, most of us still don't know how to talk about sex. We can talk about work, money, kids, literally everything else. But ask your partner what actually turns them on? Cue panic.

In this live show, Dr. Emily opens up the gates for your questions and wow, you did not hold back. She tackles why sex stops feeling fun and starts feeling like a chore, what's really going on when desire disappears, and how to flip the script from obligation back to connection.

This episode was recorded live across my social platforms at @sexwithemily — a new evolution of the show as we head into my 21st year of the podcast.

After over two decades of talking about sex, I’ve learned that real, unscripted conversations create the deepest breakthroughs. You’ll hear real questions, real interaction, and the energy of being live together as we explore how to build a sex life that actually feels good — without shame or judgment. Don't forget to tune in on most Tuesdays and Thursdays at 5 PM PST on Instagram, Tiktok, YouTube, Facebook, and Twitch all @sexwithemily. 

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why sex becomes "just another item on the to-do list" and what that really means 

• The difference between duty and desire — and why confusing them breeds resentment 

• How to rebrand sex as connection instead of obligation

More Dr. Emily: 

• Shop With Emily! Explore Emily’s favorite toys, pleasure accessories, bedroom essentials, and more — designed to support your pleasure and confidence. Free shipping on orders $99+ (some exclusions apply).

• Join the SmartSX Membership: Access exclusive sex coaching, live expert sessions, community building, and tools to enhance your pleasure and relationships with Dr. Emily Morse.

• Sex With Emily Guides: Explore pleasure, deepen connections, and enhance intimacy using these Sex With Emily downloadable guides.

• The only sex book you’ll ever need: Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure

• Want more? Visit the Sex With Emily Website

• Let’s get social: Instagram | X | Facebook | TikTok | Threads | YouTube

• Let’s text: Sign up here

• Want me to slide into your email inbox? Sign Up Here for sex tips on the regular.

This episode is sponsored by… 

Bellesa 

"EVERYONE who signs up wins a FREE toy or gift card! https://www.bboutique.co/vibe/emilymorse-podcast"

Timestamps:

0:00 - Introduction

2:36 - "Pick Up Laundry, Do Dishes, Have Sex... Check"

6:07 - When You're Not in the Mood to Give

12:25 - How to Ask Someone Out (Live Caller)

14:26 - Can You Make Her Squirt? Techniques That Actually Work

22:22 - How to Get Your Partner to Want Intimacy Again

30:53 - Finding a Third: Dos and Don'ts for Couples

36:08 - The Power of Edging

40:38 - "Desire Needs Space, Not Stress"

47:29 - How to Make Sex Feel Like Connection Again

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