Home Defense Fantasies and Appalachian Trickster Roots

In today’s New Year’s Day episode of Based Camp, Malcolm and Simone Collins dive into a wild (literally) real news story: a California man has been sharing his home with a massive 550-pound black bear for over a month — and the government won’t let him remove it! 🐻🏠

They connect it to the infamous “man or bear” debate, discuss insane wildlife protection bureaucracy (wrong bear trapped, noise devices abandoned, homeowner banned from scaring it himself), and explore parallels with protected bat colonies forcing people out of their own homes.

The conversation spirals into fascinating tangents:

* Future of genetically edited pets (talking dogs, odorless ferrets, domesticated raccoons & foxes)

* Domestication experiments (Russian foxes, urban raccoons evolving cuter features)

* Bat biology, dinosaur parasites, superior bird respiration, and WWII bat bombs 🔥🦇

* Why government inaction is exploding (qualified immunity, pothole-fixing lawsuits)

* Self-defense fantasies, Home Alone cultural appeal, and Appalachian trickster vibes

Plus: bear stereotypes, Tasmanian devil cancers, T-Rex diseases, and why humans have the best immune systems.

Episode Transcript:

Malcolm Collin: [00:00:00] Hello Simone. Remember when that thing went around that was like, would you rather run into a random man in the woods or a bear? Yeah. Or a bear. Okay, so what have I told you? And this is, I kid you not a real news story that right now in California.

There is a white man being forced to live with a black bear. Oh, by the California government? I saw, no, I saw

Simone Collins: a headline, but I didn’t click through to it. I think on Drudged it was something like man, man, still Living with Bear, or something like that. Man. Can’t get rid of bear.

Speaker 18: . It’s been over a month since that 550 pound black bear moved into his home, . He can hear it from inside of his home.

Malcolm Collin: Why? Why does it matter?

That he’s a white man. I [00:01:00] don’t know, but it seemed to matter that it was a black bear. So I’m just telling the story as I read. ‘cause no, because

Simone Collins: if it were a grizzly bear, it would be a dead person, a dead body and a house. It’ll be a dead body soon with a, a black bear. It’s a large black bear, bear attack.

When they feel, when they’re approached aggressively or they perceive to be aggressively, or

Malcolm Collin: Simone, it’s living in his house. It’s living in his house. I mean, a lot

Simone Collins: of irresponsible people adopt tiger cubs and lion cubs. This is a wild adult bear. Yeah. Well define wild. You know, when, when, when you discover that, it, it’s been living around cities and people for so long that it, it has developed habits that have adapted to them. In fact, people have found that urban raccoons have developed different morphological traits from Oh, really? Yeah. They’ve, they, they actually have more dog-like traits now. They look [00:02:00] more approachable and friendly.

They floppier ears and I think shorter snouts, they just look cuter. So yeah.

Malcolm Collin: Oh, I’d, I’d be very interested to see you know, when we go to space, if we bring raccoons with us or something. I mean, I think, I think raccoon, I think

Simone Collins: that that’s already been foretold by the Marvel cinematic

Malcolm Collin: universe.

Speaker 3: you stupid raccoon. Don’t call me a raccoon. I’m sorry I took it too far. That meant trash panda. Is that better?. It’s worse. It’s so much worse.

Malcolm Collin: This is the thing it gives true, but like, if you, if you are as soon as we can start genetically editing animals.

Yeah, it’s gonna dramatically open up the types of animals that make good pets. Yeah. And a few that like are lower tier right now Yeah. Are gonna move to high tier with genetic editing. So I know people

Simone Collins: are talking about designer babies. The thing is people are already cloning their pet dogs. It’s first gonna be designer.

And gene edited pets. Oh, right. If people are already CLO dogs, they’re going to [00:03:00] genetically modify pets super soon and already, like I can tell, our next generation is super open to that. Octavian was working next to me this this afternoon, and he’s sitting there and trying to think about what he can invent and he’s like, well.

They already invented helicopters and they already invented humans. And I’m like, well, you can invent a better human. And then he starts asking about alligators and crocodiles and worm versus cold-blooded like I It’s ha, I see the gears turning. Alright, this is happening. We’re gonna have our talking dog soon.

Well, professor two or the Commodore, whatever, we’re gonna name our next dog. It’s gonna be a talking dog.

Speaker 5: . The Soviet put me on a rocket knowing full well I never to return and I’ll die. But one thing even Uck Soviets never do is call me bad dog. God, you just let it go. A bad dog. Oh, it never stop hurting.

Malcolm Collin: But if you put pox P two [00:04:00] in dogs Yeah. It looks like you might be able to get a dog with fairly minor genetic edits that could understand human speech significantly better. Yeah. And, but what I’m saying here is I don’t even know if dogs are going to be the ultimate species to edit.

I mean, I do think we’ll do a lot of edits to dogs, but I think that there’s other species examples here would be ferrets. Ferrets would be a much more amazing pet if they didn’t smell so bad. Oh, I was just gonna say it was like. But the smell, Malcolm, with genetic edits, you can remove the smell problem from What about the greasiness?

Simone Collins: I don’t know. I feel like the, the greasiness and smelliness is a big part of their whole

Malcolm Collin: thing. Physiology.

Simone Collins: Yeah.

Malcolm Collin: Well, I don’t know. Again, with raccoons, if you can, if you can make raccoons more domesticated, like a half dog, half raccoon, I think will be, well, we already have those. Like I said, we’re getting closer.

They’re doing it on their own. But I’m thinking, you know, what do you have on? Yeah, we, yeah. In

Simone Collins: other words, we can, we can do this. In one year rather than through tons of generations of raccoons living and dying. I mean, that, that’s your [00:05:00] whole point.

Malcolm Collin: Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Well, and they’ve tried to do this with other animals.

It is hard to domesticate some species. Like there was an experiment to domesticate foxes in Russia.

Hmm. Yeah.

And they went back to a wild form fairly quickly and you, and you can still buy them by the way, if you wanna buy these like semi domesticated foxes really from Russia’s during the, the communist period.

And they developed a lot of traits of dogs like floppy ears and stuff like that, similar to the raccoons. And the, do they

Simone Collins: behave? Mostly like dogs as pets. Should we get a fox next? No, they’re love fox.

Malcolm Collin: They’re smellier. Is the biggest downside. And I, I actually wonder if that’s one of the core things was dogs and cats that we brought out of them with smelliness.

Simone Collins: That’s really interesting. I mean, if you’ve been around a dog that farts. And we all have, I think we can all beg to differ. The dogs are not stinky, but

Malcolm Collin: but most, most non like dog and cat pets that have not been around humans for a long time are quite smelly animals. Yeah.

Simone Collins: Yeah. Well, and cats uniquely, I mean, I’m sure that some people have cats with bowel problems or something, but in, in my [00:06:00] entire experience having a childhood cat, I do not recall that cat farting once or making any bad smells once aside from like vomiting sometimes.

Malcolm Collin: So anyway. Well, and, and of course we’ve gotta get to gene edited bears, right? Yeah. So anyway, back to the bears.

Speaker 9: What is a multi bear?

Oh, that’s a multi bear. Bear heads

Malcolm Collin: yeah. Oh yeah. Well, so I’m

Simone Collins: sorry. Wait. There’s a man living with a bear, but. The state isn’t letting him get rid of it. Doesn’t, does California have stand your ground laws? Can he shoot the bear in his own house?

Malcolm Collin: So I, I, I did, I do not, I do not think the stand your ground laws apply to bears. Only humans. And I do not think California has them in the first place. Let’s see. California stand your ground laws. Does California have a stand?

Simone Collins: I’m asking rock.

Malcolm Collin: No [00:07:00] it doesn’t.

Simone Collins: I am in California and there is a bear in my house.

Can I shoot it? Will I be in legal trouble for shooting this bear?

Malcolm Collin: The answer is from, from at least this case. Yes. You are not allowed to remove a bear from your house, so I want to talk about why you’re not allowed to remove a bear from your house. Okay. Actually going to be relevant to a lot of humanity growing forwards as bureaucratic institutions begin to break apart

Simone Collins: as, as, as the bears take over.

As the bears take over. They didn’t, didn’t you guys know the bear uprising?

Malcolm Collin: This is step one. But this is the, I mean, the reason I wanna cover the survey is because it’s so emblematic of many things. He

Simone Collins: hunting. He needs a hunting permit. Is it not hunting season?

Malcolm Collin: It’s not hunting season. It’s winter.

It’s, oh,

Simone Collins: see, that’s the, this is bureaucracy at

Malcolm Collin: its best.

Simone Collins: Well, sir, sir,

Malcolm Collin: you shoot summer,

Simone Collins: you, and it’s not, it’s not [00:08:00] hunting season right now.

Malcolm Collin: I, I would, I would arrange an unfortunate accident for the bear. It’s inside your

Simone Collins: home, the Castle Doctrine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you reasonably believe it’s necessary to protect yourself or others from imminent death or great bodily injury, this falls under California’s self-defense laws penal code 1 97, 1 98 0.5, castle Doctrine for inside the home, inside your home.

The Castle Doctrine dictates a presumption that if you have a reasonable fear of imminent harm, if the bear is acting aggressively, like charging or attacking it, you can just say.

Malcolm Collin: It has to. Yeah. Well, I don’t know. I, this has become a wide enough case that I think they do like a forensic analysis, and I don’t think the real

Simone Collins: case to support this California Department of Fish and Wildlife and law enforcement have ruled shootings as justified self-defense.

When a bear entered a home and showed aggression, even though no permit existed. Simone, but it was charging or acting. Well, this is true. Yeah. You cannot, you cannot shoot solely to protect property EEG if the [00:09:00] bear is just rummaging without threatening people. Deadly forces. Okay, so, so what’s happening is there’s a, there’s a squatter situation.

The bear is not charging him. It’s just like ransacking his home.

Malcolm Collin: A lot of people have been joking on these. The, it’s like a, you know, a squatter situation. It is not like legally that seems

Simone Collins: to be how this is, if he’s not allowed to take the

Malcolm Collin: actual, so see the actual thing that’s, that’s going wrong and why he can’t get rid of it.

And it’s been there since Thanksgiving, by the way, and it’s a 500 wait. That’s a long time. It’s a, it’s a 500 to 550 pound bear. It has done significant damage to his property already. It tore out the water system, so he had to get that shut off. So he has no running water to his house anymore.

A flooded basement with a bear in it. Oh. He can’t do anything about this. Right. And the reason he can’t do anything about it, and Simone, it’s 500 to 550 pounds. It’s a large bear.

Simone Collins: Yeah. So a big gun and a more bullet.

Malcolm Collin: I have not trust the gun to take it down [00:10:00] while it’s charging. Simone I, I, you, you wanna harass this thing to get it to charge?

I don’t, I don’t trust that. Yeah. This

Simone Collins: is, this is why I handle the animal problems in our house and you don’t.

Malcolm Collin: But yeah. So, but I. Before I go further with the story, the reason why I want to talk about this is just sort of the microcosm of leftist insanity like that a, a, a bear living in your house.

They do not see as a threat. They do not care about the bureaucratic downside to this, which is if this bear goes out and like malls someone on the street, this guy is gonna be responsible for it because it was on his property and yet he can’t get it off his property. It fits into the bear or man meme because if a man started living in a woman’s house, I am sure he would be evicted, right?

Like yeah. It, it plays into racial. Oh yeah, that’s true.

Simone Collins: The, the mere presence of the man would be construed as a threat. A home invasion and threat. Yeah.

Malcolm Collin: But

Simone Collins: a

Malcolm Collin: bear is not a threat.

Simone Collins: A bear.

Malcolm Collin: A bear. A bear is just like the kind with, with

Simone Collins: bear teeth and Bear Claw.

Malcolm Collin: It’s [00:11:00] just windy, the poo you can see it like barely fitting coming in and out.

Oh. But anyway, so 500 to 550 pounds. He calls the California Department of Fish and Wildlife to remove this bear. They come and they set up a meat trap and like a big like live catch bear trap. Okay. And they catch a bear. So there’s, there’s like a population of bears in this community. Oh. And they just catch the wrong bear.

So, yeah, they catch a smaller bear. They take the smaller bear away and relocate it. And I love, the guy was even like, and I felt bad about that other bear, you know, like the bear didn’t do anything. Yeah. Seriously. Well, how big of a community of bears do you have in this community? Sweet man. So anyway, like they catch the wrong bear, but they’re, they’re just like.

Okay, we’re done. And he’s like, no, there’s still a bear in my basement. Oh my God. And they’re just like, no, we caught the bear. I can’t even, that’s [00:12:00] insane. It’s exactly like that scene from 30 Rock when he is like, no, I have the government report. There’s no leak in the, in the ceiling. Yes. He’s like, but I can see the link.

Speaker 10: The Celia appears to be leaky. No, it’s not. We’ve looked into it and it’s not. Uh, if you have any questions, I’ll write down my extension for you.

Malcolm Collin: Would, would you come to my basement and look at the bear with me? And then they’re like, oh yes, there is a bear. So then they tried to get it out by putting in some sort of like a, a noise making device. Oh. Which appeared to be working, but then they shut it off arbitrarily and they haven’t explained why and they haven’t come back to try anything else after that, they have made it very clear to him that they are aware that there is a bear in his basement.

Speaker 16: Again using air horns to flush the bear out.

Johnson says it looked like it was finally working until he says they suddenly got a call ordering [00:13:00] them to stand down. Very defeated. Oh yeah. I mean, I just dropped ‘cause like, well now what? It’s all up to me. And what I’m supposed to watch my phone when he comes out in the middle of the night or like sleep in the kitchen and listen for him.

Speaker 17: Every night. I even ask like, okay, so as long as you guys are gone, can I still use the bait to get him? No, can’t.

Malcolm Collin: So he said. Can I get it? So he tried to do things. So first he tried to like play the sounds of like dogs and stuff like that to try to scare the bear out of the basement. And they came to him and they said, you can’t play any noises to scare away the bear. Only we can play noises to scare away the bear.

Wait, wait. He’s not

Simone Collins: allowed to. People are allowed to play anything they want in their own house as long as there’s not, like it disrupts the bear. Brown bears are not an A threat. This is a black bear.

Malcolm Collin: Simone, I’m sorry, a black bear. I’m sorry. Are scientifically more aggressive. Are they? Wait, are wait, are, I dunno.

I’m, I’m making [00:14:00] like fake racist claims. Okay. Because we all

Simone Collins: know that white bears are the most dangerous bears that eat peoples faces. Bears are the most

Malcolm Collin: dangerous bears. That’s true. I mean, at least he doesn’t have a white bear in his basement. Thank God this isn’t even woke nonsense. White bears are genuinely the most dangerous bears.

Yeah. And. And you know, the black bears are very, I think we just base all racial stereotypes on bears.

Simone Collins: Actually. What kind of yellow bears are the nicest, smartest bears, aren’t they? If, if a little rotund,

Malcolm Collin: I saw, wait, Grizz, grizzly, I saw blackberries were the nicest. Or brown. I’m referring

Simone Collins: to

Malcolm Collin: Winnie

Simone Collins: the Pooh.

Malcolm Collin: Oh my God. And Xi Jinping is Winnie the Pooh. Coincidence. Coincidence. Chinese propaganda. The Bear system. The bear system. We got yellow bears. We’ve got

Simone Collins: black

Malcolm Collin: bears, we’ve got brown bears. The the, the Winnie the Pooh is just a sweet little guy. He’s just, he’s just a sweet guy. He’s wise. The Dao, the Dow of Poo.

Simone Collins: Right. Holy smoke spirit [00:15:00] conspiracy me.

Malcolm Collin: Oh, it’s happening guys. It’s happening. So, but, but so he, he’s been without hot water or water, I think at all since Christmas. Wait is so wait, is this man still living in his house? Yeah, he’s living in his house. So he lives upstairs and he can hear the bear downstairs.

Okay. So

Simone Collins: let say he needs to. Pick up a prescription at the pharmacy. How does he leave his home? He just shares the driveway with the

Malcolm Collin: bear.

Simone Collins: He just walks real fast past the bear

Speaker 15: Bear that made its den under an Altadena home, still refusing to leave after more than a month. Now the homeowner there says that this massive bear has done damage to his pipes, forcing him to shut off the.

Simone Collins: and I got like beer

Malcolm Collin: or the bear walking up and down his driveway going back to its home. You know, just wait. So the bear enters and exits?

Yeah. The bear enters and exits the home. Oh, no. Okay.

Simone Collins: Then he needs to reinforce his house whenever the through through a basement window.

Malcolm Collin: Well then he needs to board up the [00:16:00] basement window. Exactly. So that appears to be like the same thing he should be doing that he’s not doing is putting forward what?

Simone Collins: I’m sorry. This man. Okay, now this is, this is looking a little different now. It was a little, it was a little suspicious when he felt bad for the other bear that got relocated first. I’m like, oh, that’s sweet of him. This man cares about bears.

Malcolm Collin: Well, I actually would be a little worried about doing it boarding up

Simone Collins: your base.

Why? Because you think you just destroy, why? Because then

Malcolm Collin: I could force the bear to come through a window. Right? Like this, this is where the bear is, is hibernating, right? Like this is, it’s Well, black bears don’t fully hibernate in this part of California. Mm-hmm. They do what’s called I wanna say like dinning or something.

Or nesting. They hurtle, durl. They, yeah, they, they find a spot that is like hibernation, but they still go out a lot. Mm. But I’d be very worried about blocking off the entrance to my basement that doesn’t go through my living room. If I had a, a very large 550 pound bear coming in there regularly,

Simone Collins: I guess [00:17:00] they do.

They’ll break car windows. That’s, that’s why they tell you if you’re camping in California, just never leave foot in your car. But

Malcolm Collin: hold on, Simone. This isn’t the only case of this happening in the us. So I wanna tell you about another case that happens regularly, which is perhaps even crazier given what we’ve gone through as a family,

Simone Collins: okay?

Malcolm Collin: Now, there have been numerous cases across the US where homeowners discovered large bat colonies in their attics. Or homes and found themselves unable to evict them due to federal or state protections.

Simone Collins: Dude, you just don’t tell anyone and you gas them all. What’s wrong with people? So if we

Malcolm Collin: haven dealt with, we have found rabid bats on our property.

Yeah, like,

Simone Collins: like actually sent in. Tested positive for rabies bats.

Malcolm Collin: Bats ‘cause rabies is very, very common. It is extremely dangerous to have a large bat [00:18:00] colony in your attic. Mm-hmm. Of living bats. And these aren’t even always in the attic. Sometimes they’re like in a room in the house or something. Yep. And they cannot be evicted In many places during maternity seasons, when flightless pups are present, evicting adults can orphan and kill the young, which is viewed as illegal or inhumane.

Homeowners also cannot harm poison or seal bats in the. They must wait till the end of the season so there was a case in. So we

Simone Collins: treat bats in the United States better than China treated its own citizens during COVID-19. We literally do, we’ve gotta probably do this country. Oh, well. At least the bats are okay.

Malcolm Collin: Right. I mean, we did try to use the bats to, to burn down part of Asia at one point. You’re familiar with the whole bat bomb thing during World War ii?

Simone Collins: No. Was this like some [00:19:00] different version of, of Acoustic Kitty, the fire bat.

Malcolm Collin: No. So it was actually a pretty clever system, but they just never implemented it.

Did they just light bats

Simone Collins: on fire and send them away? What happened?

Malcolm Collin: So, they were going to, this was in Japan release bats with small incendiary bombs on them. And the reason they were going to do it is these were bombs designed to start fires. And where bats go to like roost are like attics and stuff like that, which typically have wood are already inside the house.

Detonation. Yeah. So it would, it would’ve been bringing flammable explosives to a location that would be extremely flammable. And, you know, useful to catch on fire in a war time. Right. That makes sense. ‘

Simone Collins: cause my first instinct was why would you try to get bats to deliver anything? I mean, we’ve, we’ve all seen bats fly and they are the flimsiest flyers.

You know, you watch them fly and you’re like, are you okay? Like, I don’t think you’ve got this. I don’t think you’re a flight, A flight animal.

Malcolm Collin: I’ve seen chickens far better than

Simone Collins: you. [00:20:00]

Malcolm Collin: I’ve been watching a thing on bats, and a really interesting thing about bats is there are no terrestrial like sorry, walking bats.

Which is, I know they

Simone Collins: can’t fly. They can’t walk. I mean, the only thing they can do is hang well. That’s it. No, no.

Malcolm Collin: But what I mean is almost every other species that flies has volved walking within some Oh, yeah. Yeah. If anything an

Simone Collins: awkward waddle. I mean, so well that like some just choose to swim and walk instead.

Or just walk and walk.

Malcolm Collin: Yeah. But whether, whether you’re talking about birds which have totally walking varieties or, or flying insects, which I’ve totally walking varieties. Mm-hmm. But you do not get this in bats.

Simone Collins: The walking

Malcolm Collin: bat, the mystery, if you’re wondering the mystery on why this is the case.

The reason why is because bats unlike every other species that has evolved flight, use their legs heavily in the flying process. So it’s, is this

Simone Collins: why they fly in such an embarrassing fashion?

Malcolm Collin: I love you say embarrassing. You are embarrassed about [00:21:00] the way they use it. I see.

Simone Collins: Honestly, I cannot watch them without, ugh.

Like, oh no, come on.

Malcolm Collin: It hurts. It hurts to watch. Well, they’re a very successful cl of species. Like if, if you go,

Simone Collins: yeah, Stephen Hawking was very successful as a person, but you’d watch him wheel along and he’d be kind of like, Ugh, I feel for you, man, like you’re killing it. And he did so much better than most of us, but like, it didn’t look.

Malcolm Collin: Bats, smooth bats have been extremely biologically successful. If, if, if life was to evolve, going into the future, bats would be one of the main things we have around and evolving. You think so? Yeah.

And if you look at life After Man or the guy who did that, he did some other stuff. Douglas something I wanna say.

I really like his books. I really like that. Was Adam,

Simone Collins: the guy who wrote Guide to the Galaxy? Right.

Malcolm Collin: No, it’s Douglas something. Anyway, he, he wrote Man After Man, which is one of my favorite books, and I’ve been meaning to get it again. I had a copy, but I can’t, but they’re like $200 now.

Simone Collins: We’re so bad with names.

I’ve probably got that wrong. You trying

Malcolm Collin: to get it on eBay? And I’m like, well, I’ll wait till we have that [00:22:00] source of income. So we’ll, we’ll get our fab. Hey, our fab is like stable, stable these days. Did you get a chance to test it today?

Simone Collins: No, I’m still adjusting to our new. Schedule lifestyle.

Malcolm Collin: Yeah. But you set up the extra running machine for Octavia next to you.

And he spent all day, like, ‘cause we have a kid at home with us working from home now. Homeschooling,

Simone Collins: not working from, they don’t,

Malcolm Collin: they don’t work yet. We haven’t put him to work. He’s gotta start working in a couple years. That’s our entire, today he talked to me all about the merch he was gonna set up for this show.

Yeah. And like I

Simone Collins: was saying, he’s talking about inventions. He certainly has his mind on making money, you know, and he also named his new toy. What was it, diamond, gold, rich? No. And Rich. No, he, he named his previous toys, gold and Diamond. Now his next toys are rich, so this kid’s got earning potential

Malcolm Collin: and he was explaining merch to me today.

He’s like. Dad, like you gotta make the merch. And then you, you go to your fans and you say, I got the merch. And then you give them the merch and [00:23:00] they give you money. And I was like, you gotta invent the merch then. And he is like, I’m gonna do it. So like that’s gonna be the school project for this year. He has to invent merch for the fans, right?

And so I’ll let him explore what options exist for merch and then next year can be genetically modifying dogs. Right. We’ll see.

Simone Collins: Well, I mean, that’s the thing that’s really gonna sell the genetically modified dogs.

Malcolm Collin: Well you think he could sell that to our fans, I think, right?

Simone Collins: Well, yeah. More than just our fans.

I bet. Even our haters and I love those. But anyway, this guy

Malcolm Collin: has this one island in like Future Earth where a bunch of bats became terrestrial. And one of the most famous like creatures he has is this giant, really scary looking predatory bat species he invented. That’s like a land dwelling and like five feet old.

There are predatory

Simone Collins: bats

Malcolm Collin: already. Well, actually what’s really interesting is the bat that is the closest to being a walking bat. There’s two that are tied for it. One walks further, one walks more [00:24:00] and has stronger legs for doing stuff like jumping and stuff like that. And it, it walks by jumping, oh, do you know what bat this is?

Simone Collins: No.

Malcolm Collin: The vampire bat?

Simone Collins: No. The vampire bat is, that makes sense. Yeah. Because it’s going for terrestrial animals, so it needs more. On the ground dexterity. I guess

Malcolm Collin: another really crazy thing I learned recently, which I hadn’t really thought about before, and I saw like a cool, like YouTube on YouTube, it was great.

Okay. Hearing new ideas. I

Simone Collins: love YouTube and

Malcolm Collin: then I, I condensed it all down for you guys, the fans, so you don’t have to watch these full episodes to get to the points doing God’s work. But it’s that did you know that the skull of Sue, you know the, the giant T-Rex that, that they have the giant T-Rex skull.

Simone Collins: No,

Malcolm Collin: but sure. The most complete skeletons we have of a T-Rex, it has little markers across its lower jawbone that we can match to an avian disease. So we know it was killed by single cell parasites. And in Avians what that does is it causes so much pain that they can’t eat anymore and they have eventually starve.

And so t Rexes were killed. By small [00:25:00] parasites. And the video on was going into how common large parasites were in dinosaurs. And like, like giant ticks, giant fleas, internal worms. And one of the reasons is, and, and this is one of those things I think a lot of people don’t know it is actually interesting to, to talk about if you’re talking about comparative biology is dinosaurs.

Just do not have very good immune systems. And there, there were not good immune systems back then, so like you would just get, we’ve even found like parasites in the nests of dinosaurs, like fleas. So they just grow up and then worms on them, fleas on them, everything like that. Oh, riddled with parasites.

And. It was because they one didn’t have like Dexter arms for like, picking off parasites, like in the way that birds can do it easily through pruning. Mm. Or humans and apes can do it through like a grooming each other. Yeah. They didn’t have good immune systems. And that’s something that people who don’t know a lot about biology like you, I, I actually, I.

What, what biological system do birds have that is [00:26:00] significantly better than biological systems that mammals have? Like what is their super system? Do you, do you know this, and dinosaurs probably had this as well.

Simone Collins: I mean, I. I think their, their lightness of bones is really interesting and useful, but I don’t think that’s what you’re going for here.

Malcolm Collin: No, it’s their respiratory system.

Simone Collins: Oh. Their

Malcolm Collin: respiratory and circulatory system are better than mammalian ones. They’re just like, you know, like you, you branch off and you look at comparative biology and it’s really interesting.

‘cause on some branches you’ll just be like. Oh, they’re like millennium ahead of us in evolution in regards to so to understand why this is the case so in humans, when you breathe into your lung, exhale in your, you’re, you’re, you’re filling up both of your lungs with air that is mixing with the deoxygenated air in your lungs, and then you breathe out of your lungs, and then you breathe out.

So you’re always breathing in and breathing out to like [00:27:00] the same system, right? Yeah. Mm-hmm. With, with birds, and I think it was dinosaurs. When they breathe in, think of it like a a circulatory loop.

Simone Collins: That would make so much more sense. Yeah. From a design standpoint. Yeah, completely pressure intake an exhaust pipe.

Yeah.

Malcolm Collin: And you exhale completely exhausted air.

Simone Collins: Yeah. That would make so much more sense. Yeah,

Malcolm Collin: it makes so much more sense. And the, well, there’s other ones that, like, for example amphibians have a totally nerfed heart like circulator. So, wait, but how does,

Simone Collins: is it, is it more than like heart valves in the sense that.

You know, they’re, they’re sort of like one way chambers and like blood vessels with birds. I, I, I mean, you see bird noses and they just have little holes. It’s not like I, oh, this is the bird’s exhaust valve and this is the bird’s intake valve. So how does that work,

Malcolm Collin: Simone? It’s been. Decades since I learned this.

I have, I have not gone over this recently. So I don’t remember. But the point I was gonna make is the one system that humans have that is generally or I’d say mammals more broadly have that is like way ahead [00:28:00] of birds. Usually not, not all birds, but, but most is, are, immune system. We have like just super awesome immune systems.

Oh, thank God. Yeah. And when you think about it, it’s actually kind of wild. There are few diseases that humans get. Now we’re more in an ancestral time, which we’ve talked about with like the fungus, eight people’s faces and stuff like that. Mm-hmm. That you don’t just like get better from. And that that was not a thing historically, right?

Like that, that we have an ability to develop an immunity to almost any disease.

Simone Collins: Well, I mean, on a macro level, there are plenty of diseases that have taken out significant portions of the human population, even relatively recently with the great flu after World War I.

Malcolm Collin: Yeah. You occasionally get these, but you have these in other species.

Did you know that right now? Does it just like the random fact episode at this point? Oh boy. Did you know right now that Tasmanian devils are nearing extinction? Because in other episodes I’ve talked about canine venereal [00:29:00] transmissible cancer, which is a transmissible canines. Yeah. The only other mammal.

That have transmissional cancers. One is a for hamster, it’s like a domesticated thing. It’s, we can ignore it ‘cause it’s so rare. But other is Tasmanian devils and they have two forms in them and they might be going extinct due to these. And they arrived only fairly recently. They’re only like 20 and 40 years old each.

And what devils. What’s really weird is there’s been some recent research into the ancestral bones of Tasmanian Devils, and we’re now seeing that they may have had outbreaks of transmissible cancers in the past. Something about they

Simone Collins: survived it once, at least

Malcolm Collin: they may have survived this in the past, like the idea of like through and wiping out a population and then yeah.

But I found that really fascinating. Any, any random facts if we’re making this a random fact episode? Because I, I don’t wanna bore you with a bunch of stuff about this one story. I mean, I find this story interesting. Well, no, I mean,

Simone Collins: Just, just so we wrap this up because we don’t have to go further, I just, I [00:30:00] just.

Where, where are we? Le is is just to be continued with this guy is the next headline, man found dead in basement, eaten by bear. Like what, where are we going with this?

Malcolm Collin: Well, you, you’ve seen this for a long time. There have been a lot of instances of, road departments, departments of transportation stuff, suing people for fixing potholes.

And we’re sort of entering really a timeline where government services are no longer doing their jobs because they’re just two saddles bureaucratic, quote, forget

Simone Collins: Pizza Hut had that famous campaign where it fixed potholes, but maybe it got permits for that.

Malcolm Collin: It probably got permits for that. Yeah.

Mm-hmm. And, and said like, oh, we have government contractors, and somebody in the government was probably getting paid off. Mm-hmm. But yeah, as an individual, if you fix a pothole, you can be fine for that because you know you’re not doing it officially. There was a case,

Simone Collins: Ron Swanson did it in Parks and Rec, and that’s how he met the woman he married,

Malcolm Collin: worked for the Parks department which which I didn’t realize.

So what’s really interesting about all of this is, in inden immunity,

Qualified [00:31:00] immunity was the word I was looking for.

Malcolm Collin: I wanna say that’s what it’s called, or whatever the thing that means that cops are like subject to different legal stuff when they’re doing their jobs. I wasn’t unaware of this, but this actually applies to all government professionals whether they are like it’s civil servants or no department employees or, so it’s a civil servant

Simone Collins: edition of diplomatic immunity.

That’s really, yeah.

Malcolm Collin: Yeah. So like, they’re probably not gonna get in trouble for not doing anything about the bear. It’s like better for them to just do nothing. Right. You know, it’s a, it’s a big bear. They don’t wanna deal with it.

Simone Collins: Maybe this is what Aspen Gold has been on about so much where he’s like, the key thing is to just start arresting policemen when they don’t actually stop bad things from happening.

And I mean, then I guess if we were to remove whatever it is you’re referring to, I’ve never heard of it before, indemnity. Immunity

Malcolm Collin: then? Well, there was a case recently where there was a I wanna say it was a, a shooting that was happening and a woman saw police hiding behind something, not doing anything, and she ran to grab one of their guns and they stopped her because she wanted to try to stop the, the shooter.

[00:32:00] She tried to take a gun off a police man to shoot an active shooter. I love the balls on that. You see an active shooter, you see police people doing nothing and you’re like. I don’t have a gun, but they’ve got guns.

Simone Collins: Yeah. That woman does have kaons. I love that. Wow. Yeah. Okay. I mean, that is the world live

Malcolm Collin: in now, right?

Yes. You know, I’ll go, I’ll go take down this active shooter,

AI can’t find this incident. So maybe I’m misremembering something. , It thinks the incident that I am misremembering

is the ADE school shooting. , Where during the incident, police officers had, . Women yelling at them to do something. So maybe that’s what I’m misremembering. I don’t know.

Malcolm Collin: having to live with bears. I can imagine few things. More horrifying. I mean, imagine if there were kids in the house. No,

Simone Collins: no. This man is letting the bear in. I’m, I’m done with this man. Done with shot the bear. He, he, he’s, he’s, he’s, I don’t know.

He’s like asking for permission to play. Dogs barking in his own home. No, [00:33:00] no, no. This man deserves to bear. No, I’m no Malcolm. I will. Parks department comes to our house. There’s a dead bear in our house. Officer. He charged at me. It’s so easy. The only problem for us is which gun are we gonna use? Is it gonna be the Beretta?

It’s definitely gonna, it’s not gonna be the AR 15. I’m saving that for a human. It’s gonna be the Beretta right behind me. I’m, I’m saving that for

Malcolm Collin: a human. She wants,

Simone Collins: she wants to be used. She’s just, that’s a very pretty

Malcolm Collin: gun.

Simone Collins: No, that, that’s a bear shooting gun. You’re gonna use your Beretta over under shotgun that, I mean, oh God.

Like the first kill for that gun

Malcolm Collin: bring you at least should have somebody to backup is an ar because you need to, you need to be able to pump out a lot fairly quickly if the bear is not killed on the first shot. Okay. Okay,

Simone Collins: fine. The AR. You know,

Malcolm Collin: good. Fair point,

Simone Collins: fair point.

Malcolm Collin: I am I know, I, but I love how you feel about guns.

This is very, I think it very, it, it shows that oh my God.

Simone Collins: I just realized, so I was [00:34:00] thinking like, in this room, how many weapons do I have? I have the Beretta and then I have the, i, I literally have the arrows and, and the bow though, I’d have to string the bow, but then in that drawer right there, what do I have?

Okay, so what do I have? I have Bear Spring. Bear spray in a region with bears. I have bear spray. I just like, we’re so ready for this and this is why I have zero patience for this man when like I don’t even live in a region with bears and I literally have bear spray that I sleep right next to every night.

Malcolm Collin: No, but the

Simone Collins: way you talk about this, I

Malcolm Collin: actually wonder if this is, is this true across human? This is so appropriate,

Simone Collins: his little bear costume.

Malcolm Collin: And I want, I want commenters to weigh in on this. Yeah. Be, I don’t know if this is true across human populations or if this is a, a, some human population thing. Like or culturally specific thing.

But when I was growing up, like there’s two things that I always want. You know, you, you, you, I would build like forts and traps and stuff like [00:35:00] that and, and fantasize about somebody coming to. Try to break into my fort or trap and all of the things that I would trigger on them. Yeah. Which we haven’t done a video on this.

We’ll do it next Christmas. ‘cause I wanted to do this over Christmas, but we weren’t filming over Christmas is how Home Alone and the reason why it became so popular in the United States. I think it’s because it appealed to the greater Appalachian cultural value system of the Jack Tails, where you have the young you know, not, not overly masculine trickster who’s just dreams of.

Messing. And he, he messes with like random strangers as well? No, he, he only is truly nice to people who society rejects. And we’ll get into like all of the interesting morality of this. But. The point being is I’ve always fantasized about this, like whenever I was growing up, or even as an adult, like setting things up.

Like, okay, when we have an intruder, what am I gonna do? And Simone’s here, like, which guns do I want to use on the bear? And I wonder if others, this is what’s gonna kill us at the end is we’re gonna be like, oh, but I could. Mm. [00:36:00] But I just, oh, so many choices. So little time. I, I’m probably only gonna get to do this once and I’ve got a choice of ex, I’ve waited for this moment

Simone Collins: my whole life, and now it’s here

Malcolm Collin: and it’s so overwhelming.

Oh God. Oh my God, Simone.

Simone Collins: We

Malcolm Collin: should stop

Simone Collins: at that, but I dunno.

Malcolm Collin: Cross-culturally, or, I don’t know if this is No,

Simone Collins: no, this is a Scott’s Irish thing there. I’ve, no, I’ve only encountered people of our. Our ilk with this kinda,

Malcolm Collin: well, we’ll see. The comments will tell us. The comments will, the comments will

Simone Collins: tell us.

I love the comments.

Malcolm Collin: You guys are actually crazy. Like nobody else is like this. This is completely

Simone Collins: Oh no, we know. Hum alone would not be a Christmas classic if there weren’t this big. Sentiment if this weren’t a, a very common trait, at least in the nine, this is a

Malcolm Collin: wholesome and ethical movie to watch, but it’s only wholesome and ethical from a very neuro cultural perspective.

And this is what gets me with the recent, you know, Jewish video. We’ve a bunch of [00:37:00] people, even the whole point of video, it’s like you. Claiming people are anti-Semitic for things that are clearly not anti-Semitic is what causes more and more people to become anti-Semitic. And many people in that were just like, you’re anti-Semitic.

You can see it. You, you know what you’re doing. And I’m, like I said, nothing in that video that was not worse than what I say about my own people regularly. So I just, I find this like pearl clutching around like. And, and when I say it about my own people, I say it because it’s factual, right? Like I’m, I mean, I, I, what I realized is, oh, they don’t mean, it’s not factual, they just mean it’s bad.

And to me, I thought, like in my head, something is really only. Like, like let’s say phobic in a way, if it’s unfactual, right? If it’s, if it’s not derived at through, a pure no. Like, if

Simone Collins: it’s not legitimate criticism.

Malcolm Collin: Yeah. Yeah. And now I’ve realized, oh, like even if it’s like for my perspective, like my version of anti, I’d be like, you, you say My people are violent.

How dare you.

And I’ve realized why this shocked me is people rarely do this about their own [00:38:00] culture. So if I say something like. , Black communities have higher rates of crime. Even when you control for income, black people are gonna be like, yeah, that’s like legitimate criticism and something that we’re working on intra culturally.

, And like white women will scream at you racist, but black people will very rarely call you a racist for stating like a well-known fact like that. , Whereas. I’ve realized that there is a portion of the Jewish community, , and , a large one, like much larger than the portion of, let’s say the black community or the Indian community or any other community that will go to the white Karen screaming, antisemitic if you say an equivalent thing about the Jewish community.

And that’s why I was so shocked because it wasn’t white Karen screaming this. It was. Jews and No, I’m saying white. Karens like, again attacking my own community. Here it is. The white Karens who make these ridiculous accusations all the time and cause a lot of problems in our society The other thing that I realized after doing that episode. Is that the word antisemitic is often used in a way that I didn’t expect it to [00:39:00] be, , which caused some confusion in my head. Basically it doesn’t mean for a lot of people against the Jewish community. It means against the interest of the Jewish community.

And these are two very different things. So if I

Somebody who actively supported Israel throughout the Gaza War and the military aid we gave them throughout the Gaza War.

say something like, , we can cut off Israel after 75 years of foreign aid and helping them , in numerous wars, , a person might say. That’s certainly not anti-Jewish, but it is anti the interest of the Jewish community.

, It’s not actively helping them anymore. And because of that, it is definitionally in these people’s minds, anti-Semitic. Or I can say something like, there doesn’t seem to be any plan to pay America back for nearly a century of support. , And as such, it doesn’t make a lot of sense to continue that support and they can say in one statement. Well, of course we don’t plan to pay you back and it’s anti-Semitic for you to say that.

[00:40:00] Whereas they’re just affirming the very thing I said. And so I was wondering, well, well how is that anti-Semitic then? , And it’s like, oh, it’s anti-Semitic because it is against the interest of the Jewish people for this to be .

Conceptualized in this way, and I think even the point that I feel an interest in rehashing this because so many people claim I was anti-Semitic in the video goes further to solidify the video’s points. One of the reasons why people keep bringing this stuff up again and again and again is because they are called anti-Semitic for things that.

Within most definitions of anti-Semitic and we’re using anti-Semitic in the way we use the term racist or something is just not anti-Semitic. And then that causes more stuff like this to happen and more ideas like this to be aired, which ends up in the long term hurting the perception of the Jewish community, which is very unfortunate.

Malcolm Collin: and it’s like, well, anyway, I love you Simone. I love you so much. We’ll see how a shorter episode does. I love you too.

Comments on today’s video.

Simone Collins: A lot of people do this already. A lot of people already dissociate.

Malcolm Collin: Yeah, a lot of people. That’s what I saw in the comments. People are [00:41:00] just like, yeah, like I always do

Simone Collins: that. Yeah. It, well, a lot of people, it might also be that a lot of autistic people have more of a, an inclination to do it naturally, and I’m not sure why it could, one theory could just be that.

We’ve joked about this in other episodes, just leaving the house is so traumatic as it is just doing anything that slightly interrupts your schedule is so distressing that you develop that kind of coping mechanism as much as someone in like a normal person in a, in an abusive relationship would, you know, because you’re just freaking out about such stupid stuff.

But I don’t know. I really don’t. It can also be. The autistic lack of interest in emotion and modeling of other people, perhaps including self. I’m not sure people had some interesting things to say about their trauma driven discovery or, or adoption of dissociation as a coping mechanism, which they then, in some cases.[00:42:00]

Adapted to their everyday life in functional ways. And some people shared really sad stories about abuse. It made me wanna go back and hug their past selves, and I’m glad most of the people who commented about said abuse have left those situations or grown out of them. So that’s my summary. Oh

Malcolm Collin: my gosh.

You are so sweet. All right, I’ll get started here.

Speaker 11: Yes, finally.

They took off.

Speaker 12: Duh.

Speaker 13: Good.

Good. [00:43:00] It looks like a drawing or a mouse. Yeah, that’s ‘cause it’s a bad drawing. That’s why we need to know how to read too, right? I good and hot. Oh, you did it buddy.

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