Tributaries and the self-esteem lake

Is your teen obsessed with their appearance? Spending hours in front of the mirror, constantly taking selfies, and seeking validation for their looks? In a world where social media turns appearance into currency, building your teen's self-esteem on a stronger foundation has never been more important.

In this episode, Dr. Lisa Damour and Reena Ninan dig into a letter from a parent whose 14-year-old daughter’s world has started to revolve around how she looks. So when does preoccupation with appearance cross the line into something worth addressing?

Dr. Lisa breaks it all down, including what to say, what not to say, and how to gently guide your teen toward a stronger, more grounded sense of self.

💡 YOU'LL LEARN:

- The key sign that tells you appearance focus has gone from typical to concerning

- Dr. Lisa’s "lakes and tributaries" framework to build lasting teen self-esteem

- How to help your kid see their worth goes far beyond how they look

- The four Rs for setting limits around what your teen posts on social media

- What Dr. Lisa actually says when someone compliments her daughter's looks in public

Whether your child is a tween just becoming aware of her appearance or a teen deep in the selfie spiral, this episode will leave you with concrete language, helpful frameworks, and a clearer sense of how to talk to your teen about looks.

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Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges.  Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday.

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