Signs of coercive control and escalation

International Women’s Day is this weekend, and while we love celebrating incredible women, it also felt like the perfect time to talk about some of the very real career trade-offs a lot of us are still navigating *and this episode comes with a content warning below*.

So if one job offers a higher salary and paid parental leave… but almost zero flexibility. The other pays less, but gives you more freedom. With kids potentially on the horizon, which one actually sets you up better long term? We unpack the parental leave maths, the reality of juggling work and childcare, and why flexibility can end up being one of the most valuable things a workplace can offer. Then we had a community member write in because she was concerned about her friend. Her partner earns significantly more, keeps most of the money himself, and has shut down her plans to go back to study because it would affect his income. From the outside it feels like a huge power imbalance… but it raises the question is this actually financial control. What would you do when you notice something in a friend’s relationship that doesn’t sit right? It opens up a really thoughtful conversation about financial independence, the invisible cost of motherhood, and how to raise concerns with a friend in a way that is supportive rather than confrontational. As always, the community also had a lot to say on this one.

CONTENT WARNING: This episode talks about coersive control and financial abuse which might be triggering for some listeners. If you, or a friend needs support 1800 RESPECT offers free, confidential counselling and resources. You can visit them here. 

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Acknowledgement of Country By Nartarsha Bamblett aka Queen Acknowledgements.

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