Mutual Masturbation as a Learning Tool

You want to talk to your partner about sex. You really do. But every time you try, your throat closes, your chest tightens, and suddenly it feels easier to just… not. You're not bad at communication — your brain is literally wired to treat these conversations like threats. In this live show, I break down exactly why sex talks trigger fight-or-flight, how shame keeps us mute in the bedroom, and what to do when you've been together for years and never actually talked about what you want.

This episode was recorded LIVE across my social platforms at @sexwithemily — part of a new evolution of the show as we head into my 21st year of the podcast. After over two decades of talking about sex, I've learned that real, unscripted conversations create the deepest breakthroughs.

You'll hear real questions, real interaction, and the energy of being LIVE together as we explore how to build a sex life that actually feels good, without shame or judgment. Tune in most Tuesdays and Thursdays at 5 PM PST on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, Facebook, and Twitch all @sexwithemily.

In this episode, you'll learn: 

• Why your brain treats sex conversations like danger (and how to override it)

• How to find your sexual voice and stop cringing when you try to speak up

• A husband's honest question about rekindling intimacy after kids

You can now watch the full video podcast on YouTube!

More Dr. Emily: 

• Shop With Emily! Explore Emily’s favorite toys, pleasure accessories, bedroom essentials, and more — designed to support your pleasure and confidence. Free shipping on orders $99+ (some exclusions apply).

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• Interested in 1:1 Coaching with Emily? Reach out to enrollment@sexwithemily.com to learn more! 

• Sex With Emily Guides: Explore pleasure, deepen connections, and enhance intimacy using these Sex With Emily downloadable guides.

• The only sex book you’ll ever need: Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure

• Want more? Visit the Sex With Emily Website

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This episode is sponsored by… Timeline

Don’t let another year go by feeling less than your best. Grab 30% off your first month of Mitopure Gummies at Timeline.com/emily30

Timestamps:

00:00 - Intro

06:45 - The Clitoris Has 12,000 Nerve Endings (Full Anatomy Explained)

13:20 - How to Talk Dirty Without Feeling Cringey

18:15 - Mutual Masturbation: Why It's a Top Sex Tip

22:40 - Squirting: The Truth vs The Pressure

28:10 - Breaking Down Shame & Performance Anxiety

35:50 - Sex After Kids: Rekindling Intimacy (Live Caller Question)

38:25 - Medications Killing Your Libido (What to Do About It)

40:15 - Finding the Right Sex Therapist (Somatic vs Talk Therapy)

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