847. What I Wish I Knew Before Becoming a Parent
Almost 30
Attachment Requires Presence
Referencing Erica Commissar, Lindsey explains that attachment grows from being available and present for a child.
No one tells you what becoming a parent actually feels like. Not the baby registry, not the birth plan—but the identity shift, the relationship changes, the loneliness, grief, and joy that cracks you open. In this solo, Lindsey shares what she genuinely wishes someone had told her before becoming a mom.
From nervous system overload + sleep deprivation to partnership strain + matrescence (the emotional + psychological transformation of motherhood), Lindsey pulls back the curtain on early parenthood. This isn’t about fear—it’s about truth. The discomfort, the rewiring, the ego death, and the profound expansion that comes with raising a child.
If you’re a new mom, thinking about becoming a parent, or deep in your own identity shift in your 30s, this episode will make you feel seen. It’s honest, grounding, and deeply reassuring: you’re not doing it wrong—it’s just that big of a transformation.
We also talk about:
- Why motherhood expands your capacity for discomfort
- The nervous system rewiring that happens after having a baby
- Intrusive thoughts + heightened sensitivity in early motherhood
- Relationship changes after a baby (+ the Gottman research on partnership dips)
- Why you don’t “go back” to your old self—and why that’s freeing
- Matrescence + identity loss in your 30s
- Grieving your old life while loving your child
- How motherhood ruthlessly edits your priorities
- Perfectionism in parenting + attachment research truths
- Emotional availability vs. “doing it right”
- Loneliness in early motherhood + building your village
- Reparenting yourself while raising your child
Resources:
- Instagram: @lindseysimcik
- Order our book, Almost 30: A Definitive Guide To A Life You Love For The Next Decade and Beyond, here: https://bit.ly/Almost30Book.
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Almost 30 is edited by Garett Symes and Isabella Vaccaro.
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