Comedy Republic - I'm Just Waiting for It

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We have a very loose, dude-heavy podcast this week, that is back to back bros being bros. There is ribbing, slander, sledging, marijuana, bitcoin, and as promised rhyming.

Joining Lewis Hobba (Triple J) and Dan Ilic (Third Person Writer) on the podcast this week are two of our old friends in comedy and broadcasting Matt Okine and Alex Dyson (All Day Breakfast) ripping into the news of the week. We also talk through all things Australian Podcast Awards we give Dom Knight (The Chaser), and Andy Lee (Hamish and Andy) a call. We also get a brief La Niña whether report direct from the Bureau of the Brolly CEO, Tim Bailey.

You can now get our classic billboard artwork through our RedBubble store as stickers! And if you're an Indiegogo #JokeKeeper supporter your stickers will be going out in the mail next week!

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THANKS:

Big thanks to The Bertha Foundation, our Patreon Supporters, RODE Mics, Lee Constable, Kilian David, David Bloustien on Discord and Jacob Round on the teppanyaki timeline.

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Dan Ilic  0:00  
This podcast is supported in part by the birth of foundation. Good evening, Lewis.

Lewis Hobba  0:05  
Hello, Daniel. How are you?

Dan Ilic  0:07  
I'm good. I'm just kind of warming up you know for the big week ahead of us. And not only are we trying to get a bugle a rational fear crossover show next next week, but we've got the the Podcast Awards coming up. Do we? Like some Thursday? Thursday? Yeah, this coming Thursday. Yeah. Next week next. Did you know about this? I bought your ticket. We normally the great thing is we normally record on Thursday night so well, you will you wouldn't be doing anything anyway. Cuz usually schedule Thursday nights for us. Yeah, but you didn't. You didn't know that? No.

Lewis Hobba  0:43  
Look, it's it's a whole week ahead. And that's long term plan. But I cannot wait. I'm excited. I've been excited for months. The night free. I've got myself a new suit. I'm ready to go.

Dan Ilic  0:56  
Good. Let's call one other person who's also getting ready for the big night. Now we've got some stiff competition. There's the Boggy Creek community podcast the Candyman. A couple of blokes called Hamish and Andy housewarming, as we know, we spoke to them last week. But then we've got our old friends called The Chaser already Pete Lawler in the in the in the text has said, how do we vote for the chaser podcast? Any words? Thank you, Peter. Thank you very much for that. I just thought we'd give them a call and see how they're going. See how they're preparing for the night. Let's give DOM Knight a call. He's the co host of The Chaser podcast along with

Lewis Hobba  1:32  
you've been on a Danny poster. Do you get do you get a section of the award? You have shares in the award? Yeah,

Dan Ilic  1:37  
I do. I'm gonna say hello. Hello, Tom. Nice.

Unknown Speaker  1:41  
Hello, is this Dan Ilic it is Dan Ilic Chen

Dan Ilic  1:45  
Lewis haba. Hi, Tom.

Unknown Speaker  1:47  
Hello Lewis. taba. I'm in the middle of an Uber. Night in Sydney to watch I have the pleasure of speaking to the two of you. Well, we

Dan Ilic  1:54  
just wanted to know see how you're going. How you're preparing for the Podcast Awards coming up. We got we got a stiff competition with you also nominated for Best Comedy podcast. What are you doing to prepare?

Dom Knight  2:05  
were nominated.

Dan Ilic  2:08  
Hang on, you don't even you didn't even know you're nominated. Am I the only one that cares about these Podcast Awards?

Unknown Speaker  2:13  
Oh, no. flattering. It's flattering. But I don't want to get my hopes up because you guys will be winning the title holders?

Dan Ilic  2:22  
Yeah. Which means we got a lot to lose. Namely this glass trophy.

Dom Knight  2:27  
Ah, I mean, you say that but we didn't put billboards in you know Times Square.

Lewis Hobba  2:35  
It's over we've already lost Yeah, where the pranksters now chase up all is Yeah.

Unknown Speaker  2:42  
We're just happy to be there. Honestly. We we've our strategy this whole year has been bulk we do 10 podcasts a week. Yeah, you do one podcast a week not even every week. Sometimes you get Julia to Mrs. Amuro to do it for you. nominated? I'm just happy to be there. Oh, I will carry a bag I'll get your autograph.

Dan Ilic  3:06  
Why did you go from Why did you go from doing one podcast a day to doing two podcasts a day? That's that seems crazy to me.

Unknown Speaker  3:14  
Well with three seem too many you know the reason is, although we have talked about a late night version maybe if we can get hot

Dan Ilic  3:29  
dogs, but it's still you can get Roland Dean on satirist

Unknown Speaker  3:34  
actually you know what getting Ron Dean on and not telling him it was a joke. Now we did two a day because what we were doing is we have great guests like you know that Danny would start from rational fear semi friend of both of our shows, we just copied your playbook Gabby boss, and he's a co host he always knew we'd have them on and then we cut to cut down the interview we would have a 20 minute lovely chatting to cut it down to him in Philly. Nice, you know, radio show cell phone that we have in the morning. So we can just put them up as an afternoon session and it's

Dan Ilic  4:13  
lovely. Oh, I say you've actually done it for less work. That's clever.

Unknown Speaker  4:18  
More podcast, less work and also more fun we had done Tony Martin on actually if I'm completely honest with you, we've asked Tony Martin how to win the podcast award. And we were we were bad mouthing your podcast beat him. And so we're gonna we're gonna join forces and duties all shows up.

Dan Ilic  4:42  
Very good. Well, we will be unbeatable next year. Thank you, Dom. Good luck.

Unknown Speaker  4:46  
All the best incoming second.

Dan Ilic  4:51  
Dark Night from the taste of podcast there. I'm recording my end of irrational fear on Gadigal land in the Euro nation's sovereignty was never ceded. We need a treaty. Let's stop this.

Unknown Speaker  5:00  
rational fear contains naughty words like bricks, Canberra, fed gum and section 40 of our rational view recommended listening by immature audience.

Dan Ilic  5:13  
Tonight Peter Dutton wins a defamation case against Shane bezzie. clearing up any confusion as to whether he's a rape apologist which he is not. And George christison compares COVID restrictions to Nazi Germany, while historians compare Christiansen to Hitler's one ball, and Powershop is found to be part of a shell company. It's the 26th of November 2021. And Peter Dutton is not a rape apologist. This is irrational fear.

Welcome to irrational fear. I'm your host, former first woman president of Sweden Daniel itch. And this is the podcast that takes the scariest news stories and puts the word freedom in the headline to make them seem nice and acceptable. Let's meet our female guests for tonight. Straight from the red carpet to the luxurious world of independent podcasting. Here's the music maker filmmaker baby make a joke make some would call him a polymath. We just call him POLYMATH.

Matt Okine  6:14  
Oh kind, like guys, how's it going?

Dan Ilic  6:18  
Well, well, Matt, you make a lot of things. And you've been making mercans lately how sales has Merkin sales going? Yeah, so

Matt Okine  6:25  
I found a ball of my old hair underneath my house. My dad found it. And now you gotta understand that this hair must have been there since when I used to cut my hair at home by myself which would have been when I was maybe 1617. So we're looking at Vintage you know 1999 or 2001 Vintage. It aged pretty well. And we just saw it pop the cork on it and take it to a wig maker. So yeah back on this because look at this I got the I got the map at Tassie just sitting out the front here. The best right of forehead on my bloody head these days.

Unknown Speaker  7:02  
Terrifying. Wow.

Dan Ilic  7:03  
Well, you're you're you're a real you know, middle aged man with a with your kid. You've got your

Matt Okine  7:09  
shirts when I sneeze. For God's sake. Well, I used to be licked man.

Dan Ilic  7:15  
Alright, use broadcaster. And he's the former independent candidate for wedding. But now he spends his time as a small business owner doing it tough. It's Alex Dyson.

Alex Dyson  7:25  
How low I know one independent run. And now as a small business. I don't have to go with the liberals. I mean, the economy now. I've taken one peek at it. And it's tough to get on that tray. Elena, let's guard

Dan Ilic  7:41  
when you decided to become a small business owner, did you ever think you'd be one of those ones that were doing it tough?

Alex Dyson  7:46  
Of course, but I know no other way when it comes to business. I find the toughest way to try and do everything including getting insurance setting up the internet. There is no easy way to do it. But I'm just looking forward now that Melbourne is open to capacity that Comedy Club is up and running. I'm just hoping that the the money trickles down. You know, I'm just waiting

Lewis Hobba  8:07  
for a joke. No. Alex Dyson opened a really fun, awesome, amazing comedy venue pretty much the same week as COVID came by COVID headlining every night.

Matt Okine  8:22  
I've been taking the stage. Yeah.

Alex Dyson  8:24  
Yeah. Yeah. It's been pretty bizarre with people originally not allowed to be in Melbourne. And then one time, Brisbane people came down and had to give you shoot off stage because there was a COVID outbreak in Brisbane. It's been Yeah, up and down. But we're out and out and about now and even Dan helix came through one time as well, Dan.

Dan Ilic  8:42  
Oh, yeah. No, it's fine. It's fantastic.

Alex Dyson  8:45  
You would just suspect.

Dan Ilic  8:48  
Yeah, no living is I've been invited to perform at comedy Republic. Full disclosure, full disclosure, but COVID has locked us down several times. So we haven't been able to do it just yet. Oh, hang on a sec. Guys. friend of the show, Andy Lee is just texting me. Let's just give him a quick story about Andy you're on the podcast with a Lewis Alex dice at a meta kind. How are you today, Eddie?

Lewis Hobba  9:15  
Hello, guys.

Dan Ilic  9:16  
How are you all? Well, look, we were just calling we just called dumb Knight because he's also nominated as for Best Comedy at the Podcast Awards coming up. Do you did you did you?

Unknown Speaker  9:25  
What do you How are you preparing for the Podcast Awards?

Unknown Speaker  9:28  
When other comedy or other podcast the

Dan Ilic  9:30  
podcast that was the next Thursday night? Just tell people

Unknown Speaker  9:38  
where are they? Are they online? Or is there an event? It's an event like

Dan Ilic  9:43  
it's at the Ritz. It's at the Ritz cinema in Randwick in Sydney. You got to buy a ticket everything there isn't

Unknown Speaker  9:50  
run by it. They're like a governing podcast,

Dan Ilic  9:52  
audio, podcast, Gods Ed Australian podcast award PayPal,

Alex Dyson  9:57  
you know it's actually purchased by the petroleum company. And

Dan Ilic  10:05  
Santos is running the podcast

Unknown Speaker  10:09  
in all seriousness who are podcasting, some renegade being off the grid

Unknown Speaker  10:17  
you know it's kind of like do your own research

Unknown Speaker  10:22  
you're the one telling me

Matt Okine  10:24  
it's not the first time these have been on and it's not the first time you've been nominated Andy so I'm just imagining a warehouse somewhere with all of your awards that you never picked up you didn't even know they exist

Dan Ilic  10:38  
Do you have a trophy room in your house that you that you can barely get into?

Alex Dyson  10:43  
No, no, we had to build a separate house when Andy when he jumped on the all day breakfast podcast with Matt and Alex, you gave us a little tour of your very organized cupboards so I'm sure that if there is a cupboard it would be pristine.

Unknown Speaker  11:02  
That's true. I do like things fairly ordered.

Matt Okine  11:06  
By trophies will be organized in weight, shape and ability to kill someone is currently the most dangerous award trophy.

Unknown Speaker  11:20  
Yeah, well, I mean, believe it or not, Hamish and I have won two hours. Well, and then and that is the the most of it I mean, I feel like an imposter most of my life. But definitely, winning an area is where Hamish and I feel like the most impossible.

Matt Okine  11:38  
I've got one guy's the 2020 moment of the year, I may as well be holding up a clump of dirt according to Andy Lee

Lewis Hobba  11:54  
left more awards on the podium. He's never known about the rest of the rest of our lives.

Unknown Speaker  12:00  
That's not true. I'm humbled and humbled to be amongst great other performers that I have too many to list at

Matt Okine  12:13  
least one of them Andy.

Dan Ilic  12:22  
Andy, lay thank you so much for joining us on irrational fear and good luck at the Podcast Awards next Thursday night.

Unknown Speaker  12:28  
It means the world to me. Only do I only do what I do for awards. Yeah, I hope hopefully. Good luck to you guys.

Dan Ilic  12:39  
Thanks, Andy. Bye.

Alex Dyson  12:41  
Well, Hamish and Andy versus irrational fear in the comedy section alongside the chase mad and I mean, we took one look at that. And we said no thanks. And we're over to the best entertainment category. That's how you

Matt Okine  12:57  
try to be comedy. That's the way I would like

Lewis Hobba  13:02  
to watch you try and fail.

Dan Ilic  13:06  
Earlier this year, when at home alone together was up for Best Comedy at the actor awards. Tim mentions drama show won the Best Comedy it was like

Matt Okine  13:15  
in the same awards.

Alex Dyson  13:16  
I guess they give guess they give awards to

Dan Ilic  13:20  
dramas now for comedy.

Lewis Hobba  13:22  
Chris Tyla originated that show and he was like, I can't believe all I had to do when a comedy actor was write a drama.

Dan Ilic  13:31  
Show is totally derail today. But that's good. This week's first fear. Now if you're a subscriber to the times in the UK, you may have read this intriguing story. Taliban makes first deal selling cannabis to Australians. Now according to the story published in The Times a real website in the UK, the proper news website in the UK, an Australian company called C farm has invested 300 million pounds in a cannabis processing plant in Afghanistan to sell the good stuff back to Australians. This isn't the time this is like like a legit news site. But here's the thing. The story wasn't actually true. And see farm which is a medical advice company in Australia had to issue a statement on their website saying otherwise basically saying we have no connection with cannabis or the Taliban. We have no idea where the Taliban media release came from. Now fear mongers if you were a company that was dealing with the Taliban, isn't that just the kind of press release you would put out?

Lewis Hobba  14:32  
The Australia Wheat Board get embroiled in the Taliban

Alex Dyson  14:36  
AWB? I think that was Iraq.

Lewis Hobba  14:39  
Yeah, yeah. Who were absolutely

Alex Dyson  14:41  
fine and so there was nothing to say that.

Matt Okine  14:44  
Why Why would they be why would they be doing stuff with the Taliban when like, don't we have enough weed here?

Dan Ilic  14:52  
Well, that's that I totally agree. That's what's so if you that was what's so iffy about the original story, right? Like if they'd said the fire If the if the story had like nominated which Australian sales selling to or would have believed it like if they said oh yeah, the Taliban was selling cannabis to Chappelle Kobe's dad I would have gone yeah sounds about right

Lewis Hobba  15:09  
yeah do you know for a fact that this we'd hear it Matt

Matt Okine  15:14  
I've heard heard about it I've been shocked by seeing its use at some of the parties.

Lewis Hobba  15:25  
Oh yeah. Christian the arias I imagined it was a lot of Fury from you

Matt Okine  15:30  
know, I tell you what, I wasn't aware to the areas because I didn't have all the windows open so there was no there wasn't any anything like that going on but I would have liked a bit more fresh air in these COVID times

Lewis Hobba  15:40  
if you are an old man. Well, I mean come on

Dan Ilic  15:46  
Tim on YouTube says wait is the most cultivated crop in Australia apart from Wait Oh hey guys so we don't even need Taliban's wait surely you

Lewis Hobba  15:54  
hit up the Taliban for heroin

Dan Ilic  15:58  
Well, that's that's it yeah. No, you

Lewis Hobba  16:02  
say that's their strength it's one of their strengths.

Alex Dyson  16:03  
When it comes to international trade I think is there's more often than not there's a bit of a vey it's the opposite is true because I know isn't this parts where Australia sends camels to Saudi Arabia and it almost sand as well because our sand is better for mixing concrete or something like that. So potentially there's a little bit of a mix there and we're selling weed to the Taliban

Dan Ilic  16:25  
Wow. Oh my god next. Zealanders

Matt Okine  16:29  
are a good politician Alex. Commerce.

Lewis Hobba  16:35  
No one makes better sand than Australia.

Dan Ilic  16:39  
Oh, no, we've we've got the we've got the cleanest most pristine sand that we sell it sell around the world. Absolutely.

Lewis Hobba  16:46  
Are you guys investing in way do you guys strike me as like, I remember you and I used to share a desk the three of us and I overheard Oh, we lost the desk to the left. There was always a lot of chat about some nice investments going on between the two of you. I feel like both of you could be heavily invested in this upcoming I mean not invested in personally but financial. I thought

Matt Okine  17:08  
about it but no, I haven't I haven't looked into it. I feel like ships already sailed once it's already happened, you know, then it's then it's no good. I'm all I'm all in on the crypto now. Of course you

Dan Ilic  17:20  
get to that and say the thing about waiting Australia hasn't been legalized yet. So there's still a market yet to be made, like still a proper legal market ready to be made. Like I remember seeing one big story coming out of the United States when Wade was kind of legalized everywhere that the biggest thing to invest in was empty warehouse space, because that was the biggest demand for the new way to economy. So soon as that takes over. I'm gonna be by myself a

Matt Okine  17:43  
warehouse. You should be able to just Airbnb you're like open spaces for weed growers. I mean, it's like, Hey, I've got a I've got a closet in my house. If anyone wants to start their own farm,

Lewis Hobba  17:57  
maybe it's a good time to invest in like 711 Like all Canadian stalls, there's a line around the corner. Just trying to get under those neon lights.

Matt Okine  18:11  
It's like how did you how did you how did you afford this mansion? clear eyes?

Dan Ilic  18:19  
Yeah, Doritos, and tubes that I bought. I bought futures I bought futures in Doritos. Well, the story actually got picked up from a a Afghan news network called pack walk Afghan news network. And this is what their website looks like. And they've got a slogan and this slogan is reflecting the truth. And clearly, a reflection of the truth is a lie. And that was clearly clearly that's that's what people should know from that slogan. But this this website is so old school, they've actually got a hit counter on their stories and down the bottom. We've got a hit count of 853 people checked out the original story. They also put out a retraction for the story. So they printed a retraction and it was a C farm Australia says no deal with the Taliban. That's why the

Alex Dyson  19:10  
double digits, isn't it? Yes.

Dan Ilic  19:14  
Alex, you ready for the hit number on this 124?

Lewis Hobba  19:23  
Cypress Hill 24 hits from the bomb

Alex Dyson  19:30  
Yes, Louis.

Dan Ilic  19:32  
rational fear very confused. I'm one of the dumber one sup y'all. I'm really in a rational fear this week second fear El Salvador's President reveals plan for volcano powered Bitcoin city. President announced his government will build a seaside Bitcoin City at the base of a volcano Oh my god moto con you are big into crypto What the hell is going on here

Matt Okine  20:04  
with the positive sis man that's real bad look, I just love the way that this President announced it. He was on stage what looked like like a rock concert. And he had his hat backwards, which is the international sign for cool especially from a president I mean, come on this guy just

Alex Dyson  20:25  
the president he had on the side el presidente

Matt Okine  20:29  
hat backwards. He's talking about cities that are like made from volcano energy. I mean, this is this is the future man.

Dan Ilic  20:39  
I'm gonna play I'm gonna play some of the video I'll play the start of the the launch video. This is a gigantic rock concert. Is a volcano going off this fireworks? It looks like splendor as an animated GIF picture of the President has a UFO flying over then UFO is putting a beam down to earth and dropping the president back onto Earth. And now this is more fireworks el presidente

Alex Dyson  21:10  
I tried to be a cool politician at

Dan Ilic  21:16  
this this is the guy look at him he's easy young president like he's 40 years old like he's he is you know a co president. He's like the Elon Musk of presidents.

Matt Okine  21:27  
Yeah look it's pretty it's pretty impressive. I mean, the mining of the Bitcoin is planned to be you know done by the volcano energy it's built on volcano energy. I don't know what volcano energy is I just keep saying it.

Dan Ilic  21:41  
It's like It's like mother Miss like mother energy it comes in a different can but they're gonna build they gotta build the city next to these volcanoes like that's that like name one time name one time in history that that has gone wrong

Alex Dyson  21:57  
well I'm pretty sure that it was the people in Pompeii first used Bitcoin

Lewis Hobba  22:02  
and frozen still under the all the ash just mining their coins.

Dan Ilic  22:15  
Yeah, it's gotta wait for

Matt Okine  22:18  
the gas. Well, they say the volcano has never erupted, but it has phased and smoked quite regularly. So it is.

Lewis Hobba  22:28  
I think el presidente has faced and smoked quite regularly

Matt Okine  22:35  
alright you buddy, Bitcoin city and El Salvador and I'll call you from my

Dan Ilic  22:41  
yacht. I mean, this guy does have this guy does have a sense of the Elon Musk's about him like he. He said, If you want to build Bitcoin spread all over the world we should build, we should build some Alexandria's. The President called himself a dictator on Twitter as a joke.

Lewis Hobba  22:57  
So he's modeling himself after the ancient pharaohs. Is that the is that the bit?

Dan Ilic  23:02  
Alexandria was a Macedonian so the Alexander the Great was a Macedonian so maybe he's Mali himself after the great Macedonians.

Alex Dyson  23:09  
That's the the information you come to know I'd love for the best poverty podcast. quickfire fact checking people

Matt Okine  23:22  
believes that Bitcoin will be worth $1 million in five years. So they're investing they're buying something like $5 billion worth of bitcoin which they believe will you know, go tenfold and then they'll pay back their bond shareholders everybody wants to move into the city pays invest into it and they get it all back so

Lewis Hobba  23:41  
because El Salvador a fact right like they currencies Fox, they're like this guy's this guy is or has is basically he's like what else? Like what, what could be worse than where we are now? And I kind of shoot for the moon situation that they're in, you know, like, it is. It is exciting. I'll give him that.

Dan Ilic  24:02  
And it does it does have an element of you know, Futurism it's got it's got like leadership wrapped up in it because you know, he got us he kind of just dragging people to this space where they may or may not want to be you know, it's hard for me to make fun of this because it's kind of ticks all of my boxes to

Matt Okine  24:21  
exactly right. I mean, how many one night stands we all do at Triple J and ain't no bloody UFOs dropping us off on stage but we did it.

Alex Dyson  24:30  
One Night Stand is a concert series put on by

Lewis Hobba  24:33  
Jay Yeah, the ABC has about the same budget as El Salvador I think do sort of feel like we are playing well in there. And that's

Alex Dyson  24:42  
the problem with the ABC I say we I'm not in the in the broad church anymore, but it is stuck in the past a little bits got the old older viewers. I want to see either Botros cap on backwards coming out of an alien spaceship with the Oscar winner Morning,

Lewis Hobba  25:01  
Australia. Can I just say we actually last year there is a guy he's on Twitter his name's I don't won't name him. There is a person whose job it is at the AVC to, like, tell you when something is against the policies of the ABC. And last year, in the depths of the lockdown, you guys would know this trying to do a daily show in the depths of COVID pandemic, it was a hard time to come up with funny bits. The tough thing and I decided we were like let's make a let's make a Bitcoin. Let's do hopper and hang coin. And we sort of did a quick checks with the ABC we're like, hey, we want to launch our own currency. How would that be? And the guy wrote back, this is the most illegal request I've ever read.

Matt Okine  25:50  
It's about Shanghai, Sam and he's got to go Strv Shanghai San Mr. Speaker, Shanghai, Sam Hammond still works at racist Bridgeton let us lose connections to China, but it wasn't racist to call Sam Dastyari Shanghai. I didn't use either of those phrases. Bring it on a rational fear.

Dan Ilic  26:10  
This week's third fear it feels like we've been talking about the next federal election for some time, but the thing hasn't even been called yet. Some of my sources are saying could be first week of May. So I'm saying it could be as early as February. I have an insider saying it could be called on January 27 for a march election. But it feels like we're very much in election territory with heaps of independents announcing they're running against coalition MPs. Allegra spender this week said she's running against Dave Sharma. And when you look at her CV, it's like the school captain versus the guy everyone wants to give a wedgie to but can't because his dad pays for everyone's tickets to splendor. And Tim and Tim Wilson seat of Goldstein, it was announced or Goldstein rather, it was announced that former ABC journal and former correspondent Zoe Daniels will be running now with all of these credible, well funded serious independents rising to challenge the conservatives. Whereas labor in all of this what are they doing Alex Dyson, what tactics are labor wheeling out to battle back these concert, these independent rhyming? Rhyming, rhyming?

Alex Dyson  27:08  
They're using rhyming? And I feel that's a strong policy. I mean, they've dropped the negative getting rid of negative gearing they've stopped a lot of the taxes on the the higher income earners, they've really rolled back a few of the environmental policies. And they going with rhyming from the Shire has popular data looking at the distrustful nature of Scott Morrison and they've thought look, the last time we were in power it became because of a rhyme Kevin oh seven and won the election from from Johnny Howard. And I go Why would we go with something that doesn't work? It's back to the rhyming.

Dan Ilic  27:50  
Well, I mean, that's complicated because it's one more word than the three words slogan like hello from the Shire. Yeah. I think they're I think the maybe maybe people will be too dumb to kind of get the run.

Alex Dyson  28:01  
No, no, I think why from the shy you can you can accept the fourth word if it if it does rhyme. Okay, you can also go the suck from cook. Scott Morrison is in the electorate of cook, so they're good. I was thinking you could say the Josh Frydenberg policies the fried and Burger King Hindenburg is a three slogan for you could come through Peter Dutton could be the sinister minister, or who must not be defamed, which is a reference reference to the recent defamation case. There's very good I think coming with these they're gonna come in for a very strong showing whenever that election may drop because it's worked throughout the years over the over the distance I did it's all proof method.

Dan Ilic  28:48  
I've got three one for Sharma. The leech from the beach. Joyce, I'll go Joyce's moist. Iconic one doesn't go anywhere. Yeah, I

Lewis Hobba  28:59  
think that'll that'll come back on you. No one wants to hear.

Dan Ilic  29:02  
I've been trying really, really hard to come up with one for Greg Hunt, but I'm stuck. So, Matthew, nothing like

Lewis Hobba  29:11  
orange, you know, you just

Alex Dyson  29:13  
exactly. But I think I think Scott Morrison is they've sensed this, the liberals are panicking. They're not sure what to do. And so coming into next year, they're going to have to find someone who rhymes with the year that it's seen in order to get the victory. And so I think we can announce irrational fear. It's Gladys Liu 22 Lu 22. Going for the big seat in the lodge, I think is the only way that the Liberals gonna be able to counter this new tactic from labor.

Lewis Hobba  29:40  
Is there any way like what if Owlboy put like an all mouse over the Oh, to change it into a more of an EU sound? Oh, l Boo.

Matt Okine  29:48  
Boo. What are you gonna use if you run for parliament again? I mean, what's your slogan?

Dan Ilic  29:57  
Yeah, yeah, pre selected for the Liberal Party. Who would you

Matt Okine  30:01  
Dyson the nice one

Alex Dyson  30:04  
the nice dice I try so hard to work with a few but we'll see how it goes in water

Matt Okine  30:13  
you just using things that people said to you at high school

Alex Dyson  30:18  
a lot of my friends always complimented me to how hard I tried Yeah, it was really awesome.

Lewis Hobba  30:25  
Okay I'm Euro you know you're a professional rerun artist you're a rapper in in now

Matt Okine  30:32  
represent 2021 and check it out on

Dan Ilic  30:34  
the bottom on the Boilermakers are open for business for political consulting.

Lewis Hobba  30:39  
I would imagine Boilermakers would be a key demographic for for blue collar stuff.

Matt Okine  30:45  
Yeah, yeah. So what what do you think what would I do in terms of?

Dan Ilic  30:51  
Like, how would you? How would you? How would you set the Liberal Party members with rhymes?

Matt Okine  30:55  
I don't know. The only thing I could think of was Scott either thought he and I didn't even know if that sounds like a positive thing. is a good thing or a bad thing. I don't I don't even know anymore.

Dan Ilic  31:05  
It's you're the only you're the only person on this podcast that's allowed to said so that's

Matt Okine  31:11  
offensive saying that.

Lewis Hobba  31:15  
It stands for that. That hole over there. Oh,

Matt Okine  31:19  
that's cool. Yeah. Yeah. Is it? Oh, it is.

Dan Ilic  31:24  
Yes. That however there Yeah, yeah. Um,

Matt Okine  31:26  
I'd like to officially apologize.

Alex Dyson  31:31  
Getting up at the Australian flags in the background. I want to say sorry, but I will not be stepping down as a result of referring

Dan Ilic  31:43  
that icon you can say whatever you like Scott Morrison has proved it like this whole sank Shanghai Sam thing where he's kind of comments where people are calling you and saying, Oh, why what? Why is it racist to talk about glares, Gladys Berejiklian is not racist. Talk about saying, oh, Shanghai, Sam. And he's like, No, I don't. I don't know what you're talking about. And, and of course, Scott Morrison said Shanghai, Sam 1000 times.

Alex Dyson  32:04  
I never said that. It's like, Mike, you said it. 13. We know the number of times you've

Lewis Hobba  32:11  
both written down like he tweeted it. And then you said, you said yeah, there's no media. It's not on.

Matt Okine  32:20  
I just I would love to be able to just lie. Like, it's pretty impressive.

Dan Ilic  32:26  
Question. Yeah. I just love the idea of being able to say I reject the premise of the question. The question, the question, you're speeding, you're doing 150 and a 40. I reject the premise.

Lewis Hobba  32:41  
Does it come down to do you think there's like, do you think you could learn you could go away for a weekend? And I would just be like, Matt, your surname is Archein. And you would just be like, no, no, it's not.

Matt Okine  32:53  
And you'll be like, you can I can see the poster in the background. I'd be like, I reject what you see.

Alex Dyson  33:00  
There are many posters in many places. Obviously. Do you do any practice to run?

Absolutely not. That is funny. My first interview, like I literally submitted the papers in order to run for parliament Australia Day $2,000 and 100 signatures, you entered into the IAC. And away you go. And so I did that. And I was like, I've got a few things to do. So I won't actually start writing until a week or two afterwards. But when the names went through, journals started calling me I was like, Is this you? Are you are you running for? I yeah, I haven't officially an LCSW. But yes, and so I started doing interviews, and I was way out of practice, though good

to work around Europe, but I was not ready to go. I went to Shanghai and I didn't bring that up. But I did go.

Matt Okine  33:47  
I didn't I didn't realize that you make money from losing an election?

Alex Dyson  33:52  
You can? Absolutely,

Matt Okine  33:53  
yeah. So what how does it work again.

Alex Dyson  33:56  
So if you get over 4% of the vote, you get your deposit back your original $2,000. So that's your breakeven point. And then for every vote it over 4% You the AAC gives you about $2.96 eligibility in electoral funds is

Dan Ilic  34:15  
unlike good crowdfunding This is run

Alex Dyson  34:20  
by getting the vote in one and against that dantian I was eligible to recoup up to $29,000 of my costs in the election, but I only printed like 20 T shirts and got like 500

Dan Ilic  34:35  
but you needed you needed someone to give you an invoice for consulting Alex does.

Alex Dyson  34:39  
Exactly I needed some political consultants to play the game.

Matt Okine  34:43  
That means that next time you could Oh, cuz I mean, you what you did a dance and you jumped into a river. Right? And

Alex Dyson  34:50  
I reject the premise of the question. He was a salt, a salt water body of water.

Matt Okine  34:55  
Okay, well, I mean, you know, you could have probably claimed the dry cleaner At least for that, you know, and next time now you know that if that's how much money you could get for your campaign, you you, you got a budget of $29,000 I'm thinking and I

Alex Dyson  35:10  
spent it on skywriter Yes.

Lewis Hobba  35:16  
We said on the show talking about the evils of political corruption it's so nice to just talk about the fun of it.

Dan Ilic  35:25  
Well, that is almost it for a rational fear

Tim Bailey  35:28  
rational for you whether Tim Bailey yet Dan willing for one with a linear system coming from the eventually that'll turn into a lateral Karateka. Terry under the fridge. If you're in Perth, it's going to get hot and spicy with a love bomba porta, there's no need to rush out to supplies. As a bond. My layout is highly unlikely. But if you're in South Australia and Tasmania, you may want to fatten up because a Macarena is coming your way. Last time we saw one of those was in 1996. And it didn't go away for us. And in the long term forecast heading into the holidays, we can expect a high pressure bill is never dead, forming right across Australia. So being a despot and fill up on gasoline at your local server with a discount

Dan Ilic  36:17  
on that. Thanks Tim Balian set kind of comedy wins your best comedy podcasts 20

Alex Dyson  36:29  
Battle con stop writing the notes we need to take this back over to all day breakfast. Takeout best entertainment

Lewis Hobba  36:38  
no boss

Dan Ilic  36:45  
that is it for me. He goes Paris embrace. Let's wrap up the show big thank you to meadow Kai and Alex Dyson and Louis harbor and Tim Bailey and Alex lay and dub night. Folks, what would you like to plug Matt?

Matt Okine  37:00  
Look, I'd love to plug our podcast Matt nice all day breakfast, as well as my book being black and chicken and chips. Oh yeah. Just before Christmas. Also my show the other guy on Stan or Hulu if you're in the states and Boilermakers 2021. Man, Spotify check it out

Alex Dyson  37:18  
now. But um, yeah, jump on all day breakfast if you like podcasts every day, instead of once a week and like comedy club comedy Republic in the middle of Melbourne. Just get on it. Get it on Oh, beautiful place harbor harbor and hang 3pm weekdays triple.

Matt Okine  37:34  
I also say that for any kids, any parents out there with toddlers, I'm doing we're doing our first diversity kids show me and my music partner klp. Making kids music. We're nominated for an IRA yesterday, we lost to bully.

Lewis Hobba  37:47  
The most insane field a kid's album. Like it was an old guy. He was still putting your shoes on, like wiggles and bluee like the biggest children's artist in Australia in the world.

Matt Okine  38:06  
Anyway, we're doing our first live shows next month. So come along.

Dan Ilic  38:09  
Thank you, Louis. You're gonna plug anything?

Lewis Hobba  38:12  
No, not for me. I agree with all the previous plugs. hoburne Lincoin. Keep your eyes peeled.

Dan Ilic  38:19  
I like I can tell you we've got a rational fear live and we've got our 10 year anniversary show at the Opera House January 29. We've got some stellar people on the lineup and I think I can I can say this we got we got we got Amy remaking she's coming. And we got some we got somebody I don't get a lot of other people. I can't tell you. I can't tell you that yet. I can't say better yet. But I just Yeah, great. Tim and McCain. All right. Great. Great. So we got quite a few good people coming down the line. It's very exciting. So January Night at the Opera House. Big thank you to rode mics, the Bossa Foundation, our Patreon supporters, Jacob round on the Tepanyaki timeline. Until next time, there's always something to be fearful from. Lewis did you want to say something?

Lewis Hobba  39:01  
Dan? Yeah, have you asked the opera house how much it would be to advertise on their sales?

Dan Ilic  39:07  
I haven't, I can't buy that. You've got to like, you know, you gotta like you know,

Matt Okine  39:12  
anyone can do it. You can

Alex Dyson  39:13  
you gotta be able to rice rice horses around the place. Yeah.

Dan Ilic  39:19  
I feel like I feel like I feel like the Time Square was better than the sales. I feel like that was what you need to

Alex Dyson  39:25  
do. You need to buy a racehorse name it irrational fear and when the trifle

Matt Okine  39:33  
ever asked in the copper, whatever,

Dan Ilic  39:36  
on the Billboard front, on the Billboard front though we did have a billboard rejected from a Paris Metro Kathy Wilcox designed us a great billboard with Scott Morrison breaking up with Emmanuel Macron via text and an apology from the Australian people to the French, but I got rejected because it's too political. couldn't run it. Like ah, that was a bummer. But I've done some research and I've got some sweet billboard space penciled in Engadine

Lewis Hobba  40:03  
Paris of New South Wales and I believe it's a soft g it's already

Dan Ilic  40:17  
and there's a whole bunch of Billboard space I want to buy a billboard in Bundaberg, which is Keith Pitts electorate, and there's a is a big one, there's a digital one there that's solar powered. And we're gonna say a picture of a vibrator and say, batteries can work in the dark case. They're two, they're two things that are coming down the line. So and if you are someone who has donated to the Indiegogo and you waiting for the stickers, they're going to be going out next week. And also the who gives a crap stuff is going to be going up over the next couple of weeks as well. So big thank you to everyone who's donated there. That's it. Thanks, everyone. We'll see you next week on irrational fear.

Ira Glass  41:02  
From WBEZ, Chicago and NPR. I'm Ira Glass from the makers of This American Life and serial comms a new 10 part podcast that explores the hurt feelings of a very powerful man. Introducing Peter Dutton wins rape apologist defamation case. It's a podcast series in three acts, act one. Here's the shocking story of how a government minister who's responsible for locking up children and island Gulags had his reputation torn to shreds. When an unemployed man on Twitter called him a rape apologist. We'll hear from experts. Whether or not Peter Dutton is a rape apologist isn't the question is whether his reputation is damaged by a tweet from an unemployed man on Twitter that called him a rape apologist. Which I want to be absolutely clear. He probably isn't. In our two we'll hear from people who have read the tweet for the very first time. Does he look like a rape apologist? Well, in my honest opinion, he looks like a potato. But can a potato be a rape apologist? A canola apologist baby and x three will read out every single headline about Peter Dutton winning his rape apologist defamation case. Download Peter Dutton wins rape apologist defamation case wherever you get your podcasts and while you're there, download our hit series on Barnaby Joyce. funnier real. I'm Ira Glass

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