How to be a safe adult

Let me tell you about the time I performed Madonna's "Like a Virgin" at my elementary school talent show.

I was nine. I rolled around on the floor. I sang every single word. I thought the audience was speechless because I was that talented.

I had absolutely no idea what the word virgin meant.

Nobody asked what song I'd picked. Nobody explained it to me. And I didn't know what I didn't know.

This episode is full of stories like that one — real, honest, cringe-worthy stories from my own childhood as an autistic and ADHD kid navigating a world full of words, slang, and confusing situations. The boy who told me he was going to die. The grain alcohol I almost drank because I thought grain meant rice. The weed I offered to bring to school. The roach I politely declined at a concert because I didn't smoke bugs.

These stories are funny now. But they point to something that matters enormously for every neurodivergent child. Autistic and ADHD kids are confused by language more often than most adults realize. They take words literally. They miss the social context that neurotypical kids absorb automatically. They fill in gaps with whatever information they happen to have — which sometimes leads to some unsafe situations.

And most of the time? They're not asking for help. Because asking feels risky. Because they've already been teased for not knowing things. Because they've learned — through a hundred small moments — that some questions get you in trouble. So they guess. They go along. They stay quiet and carry the confusion alone.

In this episode, I'm talking about what we can do about that — as parents, therapists, and educators. Not with a perfect script. Not with one big talk. But with something much simpler: building the felt experience, over time, that your neurodivergent child can come to you with anything.

In this episode:

• Why neurodivergent kids are navigating confusing language every single day — and why they're often not asking for help
• Real stories of what can happen when there isn't open, safe communication with autistic and ADHD kids
• Why literal language processing makes slang, innuendo, and figures of speech genuinely confusing — not an excuse
• The one simple message that matters more than any scripted conversation
• What parents and therapists can do right now to become the safe adult a neurodivergent child actually comes to

This episode is for:

• Parents of autistic and ADHD children and teens who want to open the door to safer, more honest communication
• Therapists and counselors supporting neurodivergent kids and their families
• Anyone who grew up neurodivergent and is still carrying some of these stories themselves

Note: This episode discusses sex, drugs, and related topics through personal stories. It's a good idea to listen before sharing it with your child.

Sincerely, Holly Blanc Moses, The Mom/Neurodivergent Therapist

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