In this episode of Big Asian Energy, host John Wang sits down with resident psychologist, sexuality and relationships expert, and author of Patterns That Remain, Dr. Stacy Litam, for one of the most honest, charged, and long-overdue conversations in the Asian diaspora space: interracial relationships, and everything society projects onto them.
In this episode, they cover:
- The "Oxford Study" explained — What it actually is, where it came from (a 2023 TikTok comment), and why people keep using it to shame Asian women in interracial relationships
- Is it “Asian fetish” or “Just a preference”? — How to tell the difference, what red flags actually look like, and whether fetishization can exist in a loving, consensual relationship
- Internalized racism and partner selection — How to identify if someone’s partner selection was influenced by internalized racism
- The demasculinization of Asian men and hypersexualization of Asian women — How decades of Hollywood representation (or lack thereof) shaped the dating landscape, and how things are shifting
- "You're muddying the bloodline" and "You're colonized" — Unpacking the three most common attacks Asians in interracial relationships receive.
- How to talk to your family about dating a non-Asian person — A practical framework for navigating parental disapproval, separating "need to haves" from "nice to haves," and addressing fear with compassion
- The "Chinese era" trend — Why cultural appreciation gone corporate is a problem, and the line between appreciation and appropriation
Dr. Stacy Litam is a licensed psychologist and one of the leading voices on Asian American mental health, sexuality, and identity. Find her on Instagram and check out her previous episodes on Big Asian Energy for more.
Show Links
Guest: Dr. Stacey Litam Website: www.staceylitam.com Instagram: @drstaceyalitam
Patterns That Remain: A Guide to Healing for Asian Children of Immigrants Available on Amazon:https://www.amazon.com/Patterns-that-Remain-Children-Immigrants/dp/0197762670
