How Loathsome Is It All?

The feeling of intense repulsion, which had begun to oppress and torture his heart while he was on his way to the old woman, had by now reached such a pitch that he did not know what to do with himself. When he was in the street, he cried out, oh, God, how loathsome it all is, and can I? Can I possibly? No, it's nonsense. It's rubbish, he added resolutely. But how could such an atrocious thing come into my head? What filthy things my heart is capable of? Yes, filthy above all. And for a whole month I've been... but no words, no exclamations, could