Chris Appleton - ‘I Felt Shame Before I Felt Love’
How To Fail With Elizabeth Day
Success Doesn't Heal Inner Wounds
Chris explains that fame and money couldn't fix loneliness; inner-child work and therapy did.
Celebrity hair stylist Chris Appleton has a slew of devoted clients including Kim Kardashian, Kris Jenner and Martha Stewart, as well as millions of Instagram followers and a regular slot offering advice on The Drew Barrymore Show. His memoir, Your Roots Don’t Define You, is a New York Times bestseller.
But growing up was hard on Appleton: he was the middle of five children and struggled with undiagnosed dyslexia at school. He was bullied by his classmates for being gay - something he didn’t yet understand about himself. At 16, he left school to work full-time and began a serious relationship with his colleague, Kate. By 19, he was a father.
In this episode we discuss imposter syndrome, the darkest moments of his life, shame and the work he’s done to overcome the hurdles he’s faced. And, of course, we talk about the Kardashians.
✨ IN THIS EPISODE:
02:33 Imposter Syndrome as Fuel
04:24 Red Carpets and Online Pressure
05:27 Hair as Celebrity Identity
07:15 Memoir and Health Wake Up
08:48 Dash the Dog and Comfort
11:02 Shame Coming Out and Healing
22:26 Kids First After Divorce
23:05 Holiday Triggers and Boundaries
24:31 Success Doesn't Heal
25:18 Inner Child Healing Work
27:22 Envy Into Mentorship
30:08 Kardashians on Failure
31:25 Hair Identity and Change
35:18 Comparison and Social Media
💬 QUOTES TO REMEMBER:
It’s okay to make mistakes, but I love learning from them and understanding why we make those decisions.
Hair is such a big part of people's identity. It tells who you are.
You can externally excite yourself... But if you're not aligned internally, you still have that sad and lonely feeling.
I think imposter syndrome to an extent is healthy... It keeps me turning up to jobs prepared. I treat every job like it's the first time I've done it.
🔗 LINKS + MENTIONS:
Chris Appleton’s book Your Roots Don’t Define You, is out now
Join the How To Fail community: www.howtofail.supportingcast.fm/#content
Elizabeth’s Substack: www.theelizabethday.substack.com
📚 WANT MORE?
Rylan Clark - on public breakdowns, surviving divorce and rebuilding his sense of self.
Dawn French - on comedy, adoption and finding confidence later in life.
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Website: www.elizabethday.org
Elizabeth and Chris answer listener questions in our subscriber series, Failing with Friends. Join our community of subscribers here: www.howtofail.supportingcast.fm/#content
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Production & Post Production Coordinator: Eric Ryan
Engineer: Matias Torres
Assistant Producer: Shania Manderson
Senior Producer: Hannah Talbot
Executive Producer: Alex Lawless
How to Fail is an Elizabeth Day and Sony Music Entertainment Production.
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