Naming anxiety and its two types

You know that thing you keep saying you're going to do? The conversation you keep avoiding. The vision you have for your life that you keep putting on hold because everyone else needs something from you first.

You might think it's balance... but it's not. It's fear.

In this episode, I sit down with Micheal Felker and we get into what actually keeps people stuck, and it's not what most people think. We talk about the difference between acute and chronic anxiety, why anxiety is contagious (and I tell a story from Kenya that proves it), and what self-differentiation really means when you're trying to lead your life without losing yourself to everyone else's expectations.

Micheal shares a story about a man on a bridge that will change how you think about the responsibility you're carrying for other people's lives. And we get honest about what it looks like when you care too much about what people think of you, and what it costs you.

If you've ever felt like you're doing more work for someone else's life than they are, this one's for you.

In this episode we cover: → How to identify what's really keeping you stuck → The difference between acute and chronic anxiety → Why anxiety spreads and how to stop carrying everyone else's → What self-differentiation is and why it matters for leaders, parents, and anyone trying to move forward → The "bridge" story that will make you rethink who you're holding on to → How to have the nerve to choose your own vision without disconnecting from the people you love

Today's Guest: Micheal Felker

Micheal Felker is passionate about helping people experience hope and transformation in the areas that matter most - faith, leadership, and marriage. He serves as a pastoral coach through his ministry Kicking at the Darkness and works with Marriage Helper, supporting individuals and couples who want to rebuild and strengthen their marriages. Micheal loves helping leaders find hope, grow in resilience, and lead with courage in every area of their lives.

I'm Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes. After a decade transforming marriages at Marriage Helper, I've realized that the greatest tragedy isn't a failed relationship; it's the person who stays stuck and never experiences the fullness of all God intended.

The Way You Show Up is for the high-achiever who is tired of "fine."

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